Curse of the Lizard

Curse of the Lizard

Watched a rerun of "Extreme Gourmet" last week and was laughing that the hosts and the guest had to each eat two house lizards when they were visiting some province in China. Apparently, it is a delicacy.

I was just telling myself that I would definitely be able to overcome my dislike, disgust and mild fear of lizards and pop a couple down my gut.

Then this evening, there was this large, pinkish, sluggish, FAT lizard in the bathroom. It had a swollen tummy and it moved a little slow. And it wouldn't buzz off from the bathroom despite my constant agitation.

Finally, I decided to go for the kill. Two whacks and I still could not kill it. I thought it might be reasonably injured that I could flush it out with a jet of water, and let it run down the sewer pipe. But no! It held on to the floor.

Two water jets later, I was really incensed. I decided to look for my guns. I mean, my other weapons of lizard destruction. Then I remembered that I have a electric jug of hot water.

Bingo.

Two splashes of hot water later, the reptile was past dead. The second splash probably locked its soul in the boiled body, denying it a chance to meet its maker even. Then I flushed it out with another jet of water. Before you scream and call the SPCA or accuse me of being violent and uncaring to the lizard, I did only what I had to to make sure it was dead. I won't be rushing to find other lizards to kill soon.

So as the lizard was flushed out from behind the sewer pipe, lo and behold. It looked exactly like the lizard delicacy that the Extreme Gourmet people had to eat.

I cringed when I saw the dead lizard. I wanted to flush it down the sewer but then I was worried that if it were stuck on its way down, the rotting stench would be too much to bear. So I decided to flush it down the toilet instead.

Gingerly, I took a wad of toilet paper, folded it into a thick pad and squatted beside the dead thing, eyeing it suspiciously for any other movement.

Finally convinced that any motion was the result of water flowing past the body, I picked up the dead offender and dumped it into the toilet and I flushed.

Just then a bug landed on the back of my hand and I almost jumped out of my skin. Sigh... Overcoming a fear is definitely not easy!