Smooth As Silk

Thai Airways lived up to its promise to its customers that it is "smooth as silk". Let me show you evidence of their great work.

TG Check-in at Changi Airport, Singapore

There is perhaps nothing more appalling than seeing a relief aid mission carting a billion trillion gazillion boxes of medicine and other relief items bound for Dhaka stuck in front of two open check-in counters (out of 7). Instead of deploying staff to clear the passenger check in and luggage check in, Thai chose to do the eye power exercise.

It gets worse. There is an Internet Check In counter, which had literally no queue because 99.99% of the TG customers cannot check in online in Singapore and there is a dedicated Royal Silk Class counter with no one in line, as the flight probably has at most 12 such passengers - the seating maximum on that A333 plane. This knocks two more counters out of commission.

That leaves over 200 check in passengers waiting to be cleared by 3 counter staff. And there are many other passengers trying their luck to get on this "full flight". These people should have been attended to at the ticketing counter, not the check in counter. Yet, the staff persisted, showing their traditional Thai patience - let me check, move off counter to talk with ticketing staff, get back, say something, repeat, and end with, "You need to go to the ticketing counter to check, Sir, and then come back here at 6.50 am to check if you are allowed on this flight.

There was an Indian family that was stuck at one counter for 30 minutes and counting! Then, one of the check in supervisors came out and said, I need you (the passengers) to move! Move to that counter, she told the passengers. As the passengers moved, the queues became evident. She's just moving one queue to another. People were miffed.

I need this counter to be cleared, she declared to the Dhaka staff. Yeah right, without assistance, there was no way a single staff was going to clear the lines fast enough. Can you clear these boxes? She asked the relief mission folks. No, these are for check in!

She got past me and I told her, "Open up the internet check in counter to deal with the queues! And for goodness sake, the Business class girl can take on individual customers!" This way, the Royal Silk (aka Business) class passengers will not have to wait for more than one passenger before s/he/it gets to check in.

The manager was also nowhere to be seen. Oh wait! She appears. The Indian woman seemed only too happy to play the conductor of this messy septet, not wishing to get her hands dirty at all.

All this while, I was standing in queue.

It was indeed smooth as silk. Nothing moved.

TG Baggage Handling at Suvarnabhumi Airport, Bangkok

The Service Level Agreement must have been "first bag on belt in 15 minutes" or so. Because that was all the passengers were getting, until a few Jurassic ages later.

Passengers stood rooted to the ground, their eyes darting in rapid movement, hoping to spot their luggage. No one fainted, so the darting of the eyes must have been smooth as silk too.

Damaged Luggage Repair

The hardcase I carried to Bangkok had a rubber tubing that sealed the two halves of the luggage as it shuts. The tubing is held in place in the luggage by its natural tension. However, when my luggage arrived, the rubber tubing was ripped out, not unlike an outie belly button. Damaged. The bag was also stained with a sticky red substance which I am not sure what it really was.

Made a luggage damage report and the agent acting for TG was called to repair the luggage in Bangkok, at my request.

The bag came back and the rubber tubing, which should have been changed, was sneakily super glued to the luggage. I bet my bottom dollar that when I take this bag on an extended flight to a place such as the US, the glue will freeze, crack and take the tubing along with it. Who do I claim against then? Or what if the glue stained my clothes or items in the baggage? What do I do?

The entire transaction was smooth as silk. Almost fly by night, if you ask me. Leave bag at Concierge, luggage guy picks up, leave TG claim report in exchange for repaired luggage at Concierge thereafter.

The entire recovery was smooth as silk. So was the "con" job.

I turn and changed face. TG inflight service

Can't help noticing that the TG stewardesses are young things with nary a line on their face.

But make a request and each and everyone I've seen so far can put the best Sichuan Mask Changing Master to shame.

"Ok, sir." She went.

She looked up and her face turned. That sinister stare, the underlying belligerence, the anger at being made to serve. It wasn't me who asked, but I could not help noticing, since I am typically quite alert during certain odd flights.

If I were to borrow the MasterCard advertisement tagline and amend it later, "Change face - seamless!"

All in all, TG provided a new interpretation of SAS to me. I was a first time customer on their international flight and would I fly them again?

Let me think about it.