Thursday, January 10, 2008

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This is tongue-in-cheek and is entirely harmless. Still, if you have someone to recommend, please do.

Are you RICH?

Are you OLD?

Are you DYING?

Are you a DATIN?

If so, you are the one I am looking for!

Other qualifying conditions:

Owns (and fully paid for) a plot of land half the size of SINGAPORE
Beside the beach (optional - scared of tsunami)

Has an Olympic size swimming pool, an Olympic sized diving pool, an Olympic sized wading pool and lots of deck chairs all around

Has butlers and maids to look after me head to toe (or better still, hair to sole)

Has a 888-bedroom house with 1088 toilets, lifts, sprawling but well-coiffered yard, immaculately maintained, clean and lettable (no need to convert into hotel later!)

Has no offspring (biological or otherwise), no pets, no illicit affairs (with members of house staff e.g. butler), siblings, husband, any other blood relations

Preferably cannot tell the difference between the real thing and a leg of ham

Will die right after but not before less than what it takes for local inheritance laws to kick in

(What else am I missing?)


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