Outer Portside Engine On Fire
19 Aug 2300 hours
SQ 21 taxied out and readied for take-off. Somehow, it didn't feel right for me. I sort of knew it wasn't goodbye USA yet. I didn't think this flight was going anywhere. Not that it was particularly ominous - it was just a nagging feeling that New York still misses me. Of course, I kept my mouth shut.
This was a work trip and I am not going to carry the label of having hexed or cursed the plane with me. Anyhow, it was not my intention. And honestly, I knew I'd be fine - I've not done enough evil to go up in flames. Or down.
19 Aug After 2300 hours
We took off smoothly after the soothing plane safety video. Every time I watch the video, I laugh. How the hell would people be so calm when the plane gets depressurized so much that the oxygen supplies had to be provided by the aircraft? I mean, wouldn't there be so much turbulence and shakes and jolts that even grabbing your supply mask is like playing a game of catch? And where are the wailing babies? Even on an ordinary flight, there are times I wish I could SILENCE them! So when the plane drops so quickly, these brats are going to behave like well-brought up sedate models? Puh-leeze.
And then the part about putting on your life vest. Knowing Singaporeans, they will go, "Dunno the self-inflating device will work or not. Better try. If cannot, I better ask for a change..." *Kapoot. Foof!* The vests are inflated. Now see them duck walk to the emergency exits.
And of course, the safety ramp will be punctured after Mrs So-So jumps on because she inisted on putting on her stilettoes. There is no way her spa-ed feet are going to step on the dirty plane floors. Much less can she die without looking pretty. (I see myself stuck with this idea of high heels and dying pretty. I think the earthquake which caused the tsunami in 2004 must be the problem - concussion, I bet!)
I drifted to sleep as the plane took off. It was a light sleep. I know because I could feel the plane lift off. I kept my eyes shut and tried to get into a deeper slumber as the plane cut across the black blanket and gained altitude.
After a good while, the seat belt signs were still on. Sure, the pilot did mention that the New Jersey weather wasn't really that good and we were expecting turbulence, so he'll keep the seat belt sign on as a default. Fine by me, but this is a little too long. Normally, there would be noises to suggest that meals can be served.
So I pulled up my heavy eye lids and looked left.
19 Aug near midnight
The outer engine was on fire.
On fire.
Ok. On fire.
(Where are the exclamation marks? No need. Because the engine was just on fire what.)
So the fire raged and raged. It was a wonderful orange hue. There was no sparks. It was just like a tightly pulled orange cloth firing out from behind the engine all the way to the back of the aircraft.
The plane was still moving ahead. My Krisflyer screen was on Global Positioning System (GPS) Tracking mode.
The engine was burning and the aerofoils are still lowered. We are still gaining altitude.
So when we hit cruising altitude, when the foils are retracted, will the engine explode?
When will the engine explode? (I miss New York. When will this plane turn back?)
Or how about the engine falls off from the wing? (This way, we will definitely turn back?)
Nice, very nice, the fire. How about some pretty fireworks? Or the engine covers fall off?
Or maybe more fire?
Then there was some commotion. People were worried. Some began hyperventilating a little.
See, these are those with much negative karma. Me? I'm just waiting to return to Newark.
I begin to think where SQ will put me up when we turn around. Will it be the Marriott opposite the airport? I've seen it when I touched down. Will I get to stay there finally?
More fire, please! More fire!
"Fire! Fire!" Some passengers shouted, pointing at the engine. The stewardess sat stoic, facing opposite row 34 on the portside. She merely looked out and looked disinterested.
Hey, she must be thinking of her next trip to Century 21 (where I blew over US$200 in a 20-min shopping therapy outburst) the next morning. I may want to go back there and get myself a nice pair of jeans. Or two.
(Amazing how calm I am and how I am planning ahead of time, oblivious to all the crisis ahead, right? These were exactly my thoughts on the plane!)
Or maybe I'll sleep in. I really can do with another good sleep. Let's just see what happens.
Then someone stood up and walked forward. Can someone inform the pilot that the engine was on fire? Does the pilot know?
Only then did a senior crew member call the pilot.
"Turn it off. Turn it off!" Some moron yelled.
Yeah, right. So idiotic, right? Turn off and fly in circles ah? Stupid is as stupid suggests. Never mind. Let it burn, let it burn, let it burn.
What's the worst? The fire is not exactly spreading. It looks so pretty (the next night on my return flight, a New Yorker was telling me that she thought she was looking at a Boston sunset, which was so pretty. She sat beside me on the flight, so I hesitated to tell her one of my reasons for keeping a good distance from blondes or stupid looking red heads. Confirms my belief that there are blondes and there are blondes. Just like red heads. She was one freaking dumb red head. Hello! Boston sunset at midnight over Newark?)
So the call the made and the next thing I saw on the GPS, the plane turned westwards. It was supposed to move northwards till the north pole before turning at the polar altitudes. So it went two rounds in the air before the pilot came on the public announcement system to say that the aircraft is safe and the engineers are working on the engines.
By then the flames were gone. He has shut the engine. Shit! I miss my fire. Ok, next best bet - the engine drops off. Then I wondered where Oldwhig Al stayed. I know I've probably cleared the places where other US friends lived. I forgot where Al lived. I don't want no plane engine in his yard (even though the thousand degree heat might help his BBQ a little, but hey, that's still some debris to clear!). Ok, spare Al. Just turn around and we'll be all eternally grateful.
Three rounds later (the fifth round), the pilot came on and said, we are still working on it. My crew and I are discussing whether we should go ahead or turn back.
20 Aug Just past midnight.
This was quite about it for some people. I heard groans.
I went like, What? If you are not sure whether to go ahead or turn back, f**king turn back. Do you even need to THINK or DISCUSS? I mean, think about it, you'll be flying over open seas strewn with ice bergs along the Polar Route. Then it dawned upon me that it is also ok to carry on. No big deal. Even if the plane crashes, as long as you don't get blown apart or become disintegrated in the end, we'll all freeze (to death). Our watery graves will probably preserve us as well (think Titanic).
But I was quite sure I am dissed hearing those words of no wisdom. I mean, do you have to make people guess? It's another 18 hours into the wilderness and you don't even know if the plane can stay up. (The engine can go down, drop down, whatever, but the plane should not).
But I knew the decision was taken when I saw the pilot break out of the fifth circle and went further northwestwards.
You know, every time the plane reaches a particular part of the circle, there will be turbulence. Not very turbulent, but you could feel it shake a little. So when it flew further away, it didn't feel that bad.
And the announcement came that we are turning back after all. But, of course there's a but. How can there be no buts? Absolutely, positive, definitely will have a but somewhere. What else are you expecting? We are turning back but we can't land because we are overladen with fuel. We need to jettison fuel by flying aimlessly for another hour or so.
The plane then went in bigger circles, flying nearly up to the Canadian border before turning back. It was darn boring while we waited.
Finally, we were just under maximum landing weight. On the return journey back to Newark, the plane hit turbulence and the captain ordered all crew to be seated.
Not long later, a Singaporean woman pressed the bell for service.
No one attended to her, of course. We never know when the next turbulence will hit.
I got slightly worried now. What if they lowered the aerofoils for landing and the friction caused an explosion? It'll be so dumb to go down in flames after so long, won't it? I would feel that way.
Finally, the plane landed in Newark. On the runway behind where the plane landed, all available lanes were lined with fire trucks flashing their lights. It was like a scene from some kind of VIP landing.
The post-landing administration is another blog entry.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
My East Coast US Trip
My East Coast US Trip
1. A few days before the trip, the British authorities uncovered the plot to bomb American aircraft using chemicals in "liquid" state. Any idiot would know that this is highly unlikely - you may get a mini school laboratory sized explosion but it will never take out the aircraft. Worse, the terrorists may end up with chemical burns more than anything else. So, the stupid plot aside, the security was stepped up to near infinity (the airport authorities are only short of making me clear secondary screening in my underwear only) and I was constantly checking if my laptop could make the journey as a cabin item. Everything went well except one item.
2. When I arrived at Changi, I saw the airport auxillary police guards screening bags by opening them. Oh well, my bags are not too full anyway. They checked and even screened my polycom set (used for multiparty teleconferencing). And then I asked if I could bring my lip balm onboard the aircraft. The police said yes. When I reached secondary clearance, they said no. I ticked them off, of course, for lack of coordination.
3. The outward flight was great. Was seated beside a urologist and we talked because we realised we shared some common background. We had come from the same unit although not at the same time. We compared notes, joked with the stewardesses, went for additional ice creams. And of course, he drank himself happy.
4. We arrived in Newark on time. Had dinner and chatted a bit. Suddenly, the secondary check-in area for my flight to Washington DC was all choked up. People were in foul moods, kids were crying and screaming, adults were agitated and impatient. Hello! If you are afraid of missing the plane, bloody hell check in early! Mdm Hysterical and her two sons were grounded because she and both her brats were not able to behave rationally. Go figure.
5. Washington DC. Monday. First day of meetings. Sore throat. Tonsilitis.
6. Days passed in a blur - if I took cough mixture, I was zoned out. If I didn't take cough mixture, I was coughing my lungs out.
7. Finally, it's time to go to New York. It was a Boeing 737 plane that seated less than 50 passengers. So nice. Loved it. I believe they had to use the 737 instead of the usual Embraer because the 30-seater Embraer will not be able to tackle the cross-winds when landing.
8. War at Marriott Marquis New York. They claimed I was not booked even though I had the hotel voucher to prove my booking.
9. New York, New York, New York. A feeling of getting to know you too late in life. New York is the place where I can live and work. It is so vibrant, so lively, so diverse, so rich in culture and cultural diversity. I saw Ground Zero, I blew more than 200 bucks in 20 minutes shopping for clothes. Food was nice, weather was nice, people were, well, mainly foreign. Still, New York is tops in my list of best cities to live in (based on where I have gone to so far). Shaoxing, Bangkok, Chiang Mai, Beijing, and I'll add on when I think of others.
10. I stayed on the 45 floor of Marriott. Never had it so good. But it was facing the wrong side of the road. I should be facing Broadway. Times Square. The lights and all. It's like Christmas EVERY EVENING.
11. Toys R Us with a ferris wheel INSIDE the shop!
12. So many Broadway shows, so many things to do, so little time.
13. Met my chat buds and they came all the way from New Jersey, we went to Central Park and did some window shopping. They treated me to a great grill dinner at Redeye Grill. So nice.
14. SQ 21 plane engine caught fire one hour after take off. This would warrant a different blog entry.
1. A few days before the trip, the British authorities uncovered the plot to bomb American aircraft using chemicals in "liquid" state. Any idiot would know that this is highly unlikely - you may get a mini school laboratory sized explosion but it will never take out the aircraft. Worse, the terrorists may end up with chemical burns more than anything else. So, the stupid plot aside, the security was stepped up to near infinity (the airport authorities are only short of making me clear secondary screening in my underwear only) and I was constantly checking if my laptop could make the journey as a cabin item. Everything went well except one item.
2. When I arrived at Changi, I saw the airport auxillary police guards screening bags by opening them. Oh well, my bags are not too full anyway. They checked and even screened my polycom set (used for multiparty teleconferencing). And then I asked if I could bring my lip balm onboard the aircraft. The police said yes. When I reached secondary clearance, they said no. I ticked them off, of course, for lack of coordination.
3. The outward flight was great. Was seated beside a urologist and we talked because we realised we shared some common background. We had come from the same unit although not at the same time. We compared notes, joked with the stewardesses, went for additional ice creams. And of course, he drank himself happy.
4. We arrived in Newark on time. Had dinner and chatted a bit. Suddenly, the secondary check-in area for my flight to Washington DC was all choked up. People were in foul moods, kids were crying and screaming, adults were agitated and impatient. Hello! If you are afraid of missing the plane, bloody hell check in early! Mdm Hysterical and her two sons were grounded because she and both her brats were not able to behave rationally. Go figure.
5. Washington DC. Monday. First day of meetings. Sore throat. Tonsilitis.
6. Days passed in a blur - if I took cough mixture, I was zoned out. If I didn't take cough mixture, I was coughing my lungs out.
7. Finally, it's time to go to New York. It was a Boeing 737 plane that seated less than 50 passengers. So nice. Loved it. I believe they had to use the 737 instead of the usual Embraer because the 30-seater Embraer will not be able to tackle the cross-winds when landing.
8. War at Marriott Marquis New York. They claimed I was not booked even though I had the hotel voucher to prove my booking.
9. New York, New York, New York. A feeling of getting to know you too late in life. New York is the place where I can live and work. It is so vibrant, so lively, so diverse, so rich in culture and cultural diversity. I saw Ground Zero, I blew more than 200 bucks in 20 minutes shopping for clothes. Food was nice, weather was nice, people were, well, mainly foreign. Still, New York is tops in my list of best cities to live in (based on where I have gone to so far). Shaoxing, Bangkok, Chiang Mai, Beijing, and I'll add on when I think of others.
10. I stayed on the 45 floor of Marriott. Never had it so good. But it was facing the wrong side of the road. I should be facing Broadway. Times Square. The lights and all. It's like Christmas EVERY EVENING.
11. Toys R Us with a ferris wheel INSIDE the shop!
12. So many Broadway shows, so many things to do, so little time.
13. Met my chat buds and they came all the way from New Jersey, we went to Central Park and did some window shopping. They treated me to a great grill dinner at Redeye Grill. So nice.
14. SQ 21 plane engine caught fire one hour after take off. This would warrant a different blog entry.
Monday, July 31, 2006
Memories of US West Coast
Memories of US West Coast
Let me count the things I remember.
1. I didn't know that Marriott Torrance was near a beach, where we could have good seafood.
2. I lost my way when I scooted out of Macy's Mall (just opposite my hotel). I wanted to evacuate before they shut all the doors at closing time (and risk being locked in) and got lost outside the mall. Turn left, turn right? No one knows. But after seeing a policeman and asking for directions, I found my way back eventually.
3. I don't know what West Hollywood looked like, though I visited.
4. The Standard Hotel in West Hollywood has its name inverted. On purpose, of course.
5. University of Southern California was big and hot (in summer).
6. A new building with broken aircon (a well-known, big name think tank).
7. Embraers are darned small air craft.
8. Monterey Fishermen's Wharf has free clam chowder for sampling. If you know what to do, you can save dinner money.
9. Monterey is one nice place, but honestly not my kind of place.
10. Palo Alto (aka Silicon Valley) is just a mass of concrete buildings.
11. San Jose is a tired little place.
12. I'll never leave my heart in San Francisco.
13. See's chocolates.
14. Strawberry infused water tastes great - now the bigger problem is how to pour the water out of the pot. The berries have often clogged the spout.
15. Bagels. And flavoured Philadelphia cream cheese.
16. The less you pay, the more you get - a second liner hotel in the Marriott chain offered free internet whereas the first liners required you to pay to use the internet.
17. The more you pay, the worse your room. Monterey Marriott gave me a room that was so out of the way that it took the time to run a marathon to get to the lift lobby. Dragging a suitcase, that is.
18. Never judge a building by its facade - the grander it looks, the yuckier inside.
19. [I will probably need Al and my other US readers to confirm this but] Americans seem darned rich. Hey, they seem to go fishing or hiking all the time and be able to pay big bucks to stay in Concierge Level rooms!
20. SSSS - Special Secondary Security Search (or something like that) - the cursed 4-letter word printed on your boarding pass means you are going to be searched big time. I got it in LA. They searched and patted me down. (They probably also checked if it was true human blubber and not packed explosives.) But why didn't they think of liposuctioning me, since my thick, blubbery love handles are actually also flamable?
21. The queue that you are in will NEVER move.
22. In the most sound-proofed and enclosed areas, babies and kids will start wailing the loudest. (I think this is not just for USWC but everywhere too.)
23. American portions are just nice. You either skip starters or dessert. Or even both sometimes. Saves money and calories.
24. Chinese food in America is not as bad as you think (though they are not exactly authentic). But then again, if Chinese food in China in authentic, then I have problems everywhere because Chinese food anywhere else hardly tastes as bad as those from China.
25. Magazines. They have almost anything under the sun. Don't just play-play ok.
26. Cars. Every road is jam packed with cars. And with gas prices so high, you wonder why people would buy such big monsters. But they do.
27. Cheap cigarettes. There was a comic I saw when I was there. Osama asked the tobacco barons if they needed his services to kill more Americans. The barons replied, "No need. They are just doing fine." At less than half of what it costs in Singapore, lighting up is cheap.
28. Late night shows. Not for those who are overly uptight and lacking humour. Often no-holds barred and hilarious! Oh, I liked that one where PIs tracked down stray married partners. That's so bitchy, especially when a husband got PIs to track down his bi- wife (he never guessed till the end!).
29. 6 pillows on a bed.
30. Cool summer evenings.
31. Endless meetings.
32. Quaint little houses along the way to West Hollywood.
33. Graffiti. So pretty. So artistic that you forget they are vandalism.
34. Book stores. Many of them.
35. Moving scenery (from a fast moving bus scooting us from meeting venue to meeting venue)
36. Staples Centre - Home of the LA Lakers!
37. Jam packed San Francisco.
38. The Pacific Ocean from various parts of the shoreline.
39. Flowers in full bloom.
40. Traffic light junction vagrants/beggars.
Let me count the things I remember.
1. I didn't know that Marriott Torrance was near a beach, where we could have good seafood.
2. I lost my way when I scooted out of Macy's Mall (just opposite my hotel). I wanted to evacuate before they shut all the doors at closing time (and risk being locked in) and got lost outside the mall. Turn left, turn right? No one knows. But after seeing a policeman and asking for directions, I found my way back eventually.
3. I don't know what West Hollywood looked like, though I visited.
4. The Standard Hotel in West Hollywood has its name inverted. On purpose, of course.
5. University of Southern California was big and hot (in summer).
6. A new building with broken aircon (a well-known, big name think tank).
7. Embraers are darned small air craft.
8. Monterey Fishermen's Wharf has free clam chowder for sampling. If you know what to do, you can save dinner money.
9. Monterey is one nice place, but honestly not my kind of place.
10. Palo Alto (aka Silicon Valley) is just a mass of concrete buildings.
11. San Jose is a tired little place.
12. I'll never leave my heart in San Francisco.
13. See's chocolates.
14. Strawberry infused water tastes great - now the bigger problem is how to pour the water out of the pot. The berries have often clogged the spout.
15. Bagels. And flavoured Philadelphia cream cheese.
16. The less you pay, the more you get - a second liner hotel in the Marriott chain offered free internet whereas the first liners required you to pay to use the internet.
17. The more you pay, the worse your room. Monterey Marriott gave me a room that was so out of the way that it took the time to run a marathon to get to the lift lobby. Dragging a suitcase, that is.
18. Never judge a building by its facade - the grander it looks, the yuckier inside.
19. [I will probably need Al and my other US readers to confirm this but] Americans seem darned rich. Hey, they seem to go fishing or hiking all the time and be able to pay big bucks to stay in Concierge Level rooms!
20. SSSS - Special Secondary Security Search (or something like that) - the cursed 4-letter word printed on your boarding pass means you are going to be searched big time. I got it in LA. They searched and patted me down. (They probably also checked if it was true human blubber and not packed explosives.) But why didn't they think of liposuctioning me, since my thick, blubbery love handles are actually also flamable?
21. The queue that you are in will NEVER move.
22. In the most sound-proofed and enclosed areas, babies and kids will start wailing the loudest. (I think this is not just for USWC but everywhere too.)
23. American portions are just nice. You either skip starters or dessert. Or even both sometimes. Saves money and calories.
24. Chinese food in America is not as bad as you think (though they are not exactly authentic). But then again, if Chinese food in China in authentic, then I have problems everywhere because Chinese food anywhere else hardly tastes as bad as those from China.
25. Magazines. They have almost anything under the sun. Don't just play-play ok.
26. Cars. Every road is jam packed with cars. And with gas prices so high, you wonder why people would buy such big monsters. But they do.
27. Cheap cigarettes. There was a comic I saw when I was there. Osama asked the tobacco barons if they needed his services to kill more Americans. The barons replied, "No need. They are just doing fine." At less than half of what it costs in Singapore, lighting up is cheap.
28. Late night shows. Not for those who are overly uptight and lacking humour. Often no-holds barred and hilarious! Oh, I liked that one where PIs tracked down stray married partners. That's so bitchy, especially when a husband got PIs to track down his bi- wife (he never guessed till the end!).
29. 6 pillows on a bed.
30. Cool summer evenings.
31. Endless meetings.
32. Quaint little houses along the way to West Hollywood.
33. Graffiti. So pretty. So artistic that you forget they are vandalism.
34. Book stores. Many of them.
35. Moving scenery (from a fast moving bus scooting us from meeting venue to meeting venue)
36. Staples Centre - Home of the LA Lakers!
37. Jam packed San Francisco.
38. The Pacific Ocean from various parts of the shoreline.
39. Flowers in full bloom.
40. Traffic light junction vagrants/beggars.
So fast so little
So fast so little
1. Time past so fast and I have blogged so little.
2. Things went so fast and I could only do so little.
3. The nights went so fast and I slept so little.
4. The work load built up so fast and I could do anything else so little.
5. The phone calls came so fast and I could say so little.
6. Weight gains so fast and hard effort sheds it so little.
7. I think so fast and I could only remember so little.
8. The aeroplane flies so fast and the ground it covered is so little.
9. Money is spent so fast and saved so little.
10. I need to go so fast and I really can only write so little.
1. Time past so fast and I have blogged so little.
2. Things went so fast and I could only do so little.
3. The nights went so fast and I slept so little.
4. The work load built up so fast and I could do anything else so little.
5. The phone calls came so fast and I could say so little.
6. Weight gains so fast and hard effort sheds it so little.
7. I think so fast and I could only remember so little.
8. The aeroplane flies so fast and the ground it covered is so little.
9. Money is spent so fast and saved so little.
10. I need to go so fast and I really can only write so little.
Monday, July 17, 2006
The Full Deck
The Full Deck
Like playing
Cards sat in piles in front of me like a
Dealer in a game of Black Jack anxiously waiting for that
Elusive trump to sweep all cards off the
Table with the money too
Names like numbers in a
Deck each individually identifying some
Value which gives immense
Joy or deep frustration over the predestined ill
Luck of a hand that cannot expect to
Stand and walk away
Each round the cards are played
Fatefully shuffled and distributed among the thrill
Seekers and those pre-disposed to be emptying their
Pockets yet another picture and a cursed
Two, three, four, or five
Faced against an exposed eight and a downturned card
To hit or to stand is a matter of a chance
Meeting name cards of people met in
Fleeting encounters where words are spoken, ideas are shared, arrangements are made (just
Like in the moments of need) the elusive
Card of the very one person needed is never
There like the card that seems missing in the game never making a
Full deck
Like playing
Cards sat in piles in front of me like a
Dealer in a game of Black Jack anxiously waiting for that
Elusive trump to sweep all cards off the
Table with the money too
Names like numbers in a
Deck each individually identifying some
Value which gives immense
Joy or deep frustration over the predestined ill
Luck of a hand that cannot expect to
Stand and walk away
Each round the cards are played
Fatefully shuffled and distributed among the thrill
Seekers and those pre-disposed to be emptying their
Pockets yet another picture and a cursed
Two, three, four, or five
Faced against an exposed eight and a downturned card
To hit or to stand is a matter of a chance
Meeting name cards of people met in
Fleeting encounters where words are spoken, ideas are shared, arrangements are made (just
Like in the moments of need) the elusive
Card of the very one person needed is never
There like the card that seems missing in the game never making a
Full deck
Sunday, July 09, 2006
Brief Update
Brief Update
23 Jun - signed lease for new place
24 Jun - clean up of new place
It took 6 half-pails of water to clean up!
25 Jum - cannot afford to go to new place
We needed a break. Otherwise, we'll be so dead tired, or worse dead, by the time the big move comes along.
26 Jun - called Asia-Trans Worldwide Moving (S) Pte Ltd movers
At the same time, I met my contractor for quotations for minor jobs at the new place. After all, a 30 year old house needs what it needs, upgraded or not. Look at me, just a few days over 30 (ok, make that a handful plus of months) and I'm probably in need of more overhaul that I ever imagine. An oil change, or drainage, for a start... First load packed for own move.
27 Jun - moving consultant came to quote
First load moved over to new house.
28 Jun - received quotation
Nearly died. The quotation was $750! Include GST and we are looking at a good $800. They had better do a good job.
Second load packed and moved to new place.
29 Jun - boxes from movers cannot be used
WHO WOULD USE USED BOXES for clean stuff like clothes and plates and bowls. Worse, these boxes didn't come from a home move. Called moving consultant and quarrelled.
Third load packed and moved to new place.
30 Jun - new, clean boxes arrived.
Initial planning and some packing.
Fourth load packed and moved to new place.
1 Jul - angels arrived
My ex-students, 6 of them, came and helped me with the packing. They were the best thing to happen for a long long long long time. Enough said. I promised them a thank-you meal later. I'll try to make yam paste dessert for them when they come for the meal (Sheena has kindly agreed to wash up the dishes and clean up my kitchen after that. All for my orh-nee. I'm blessed!)
2 Jul - final packing and checks
3 Jul - movers came
Apart from damaging the base of one of my imported teak-wood cupboards (it costs $1200 each!), they also broke a plate (my angels did well, but few things will surivive the very uncoordinated, rough handling of boxes) and left a cigarette burn mark on one of my boxes. The movers were grossly unprofessional. They turned my staircase into a slide and slid the boxes down with little or no regard to the contents. They hit the furniture here and there and caused damage. They smoked and threw the cig butts in my place. They drank the canned drinks I offered and left the cans all over the place. They dirtied the house with their shoes and sticky tape and also damaged many of my stuff by bundling them with sticky tape.
WORST OF ALL, I suffered from acute lumbargo that day. My back simply acted up and I was out of commission.
4 Jul - out of action
Boss messaged me to call and I had to call on the bed. I simply could not get out.
5 Jul - some boxes unpacked
The mess got messier.
6 Jul - madness as more boxes unpacked
THe furniture got moved around because we could not figure out the best way of arranging the stuff.
7 Jul - the mess got arranged some
In the end, we went to watch Superman and I wondered where I had left the remote control. Then I forgot I could not do the fast forward in a movie theatre, even if I had the remote. Then I wished I was Lex Luthor. God! It must have been a real kick kicking the shit out of Supes.
8 Jul - more arranging took place
9 Jul - off to USA
I'll be off till 16 Jul. Housemate's going to have to help with the mess. Then I'm going to tear my hair out trying to fugure out where he left everything.
Until then.
23 Jun - signed lease for new place
24 Jun - clean up of new place
It took 6 half-pails of water to clean up!
25 Jum - cannot afford to go to new place
We needed a break. Otherwise, we'll be so dead tired, or worse dead, by the time the big move comes along.
26 Jun - called Asia-Trans Worldwide Moving (S) Pte Ltd movers
At the same time, I met my contractor for quotations for minor jobs at the new place. After all, a 30 year old house needs what it needs, upgraded or not. Look at me, just a few days over 30 (ok, make that a handful plus of months) and I'm probably in need of more overhaul that I ever imagine. An oil change, or drainage, for a start... First load packed for own move.
27 Jun - moving consultant came to quote
First load moved over to new house.
28 Jun - received quotation
Nearly died. The quotation was $750! Include GST and we are looking at a good $800. They had better do a good job.
Second load packed and moved to new place.
29 Jun - boxes from movers cannot be used
WHO WOULD USE USED BOXES for clean stuff like clothes and plates and bowls. Worse, these boxes didn't come from a home move. Called moving consultant and quarrelled.
Third load packed and moved to new place.
30 Jun - new, clean boxes arrived.
Initial planning and some packing.
Fourth load packed and moved to new place.
1 Jul - angels arrived
My ex-students, 6 of them, came and helped me with the packing. They were the best thing to happen for a long long long long time. Enough said. I promised them a thank-you meal later. I'll try to make yam paste dessert for them when they come for the meal (Sheena has kindly agreed to wash up the dishes and clean up my kitchen after that. All for my orh-nee. I'm blessed!)
2 Jul - final packing and checks
3 Jul - movers came
Apart from damaging the base of one of my imported teak-wood cupboards (it costs $1200 each!), they also broke a plate (my angels did well, but few things will surivive the very uncoordinated, rough handling of boxes) and left a cigarette burn mark on one of my boxes. The movers were grossly unprofessional. They turned my staircase into a slide and slid the boxes down with little or no regard to the contents. They hit the furniture here and there and caused damage. They smoked and threw the cig butts in my place. They drank the canned drinks I offered and left the cans all over the place. They dirtied the house with their shoes and sticky tape and also damaged many of my stuff by bundling them with sticky tape.
WORST OF ALL, I suffered from acute lumbargo that day. My back simply acted up and I was out of commission.
4 Jul - out of action
Boss messaged me to call and I had to call on the bed. I simply could not get out.
5 Jul - some boxes unpacked
The mess got messier.
6 Jul - madness as more boxes unpacked
THe furniture got moved around because we could not figure out the best way of arranging the stuff.
7 Jul - the mess got arranged some
In the end, we went to watch Superman and I wondered where I had left the remote control. Then I forgot I could not do the fast forward in a movie theatre, even if I had the remote. Then I wished I was Lex Luthor. God! It must have been a real kick kicking the shit out of Supes.
8 Jul - more arranging took place
9 Jul - off to USA
I'll be off till 16 Jul. Housemate's going to have to help with the mess. Then I'm going to tear my hair out trying to fugure out where he left everything.
Until then.
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Saying No
Saying No
It's not easy to say No. Among others, it requires
Wisdom
Knowing why is crucial
Diplomacy
Doing it right is critical
Tact
Knowing what not to say is important
Guts
Especially when it is to be uttered at the wrong time
And then I got interrupted and I forgot what I wanted to say. That's why it's important to know HOW TO SAY NO and WHEN to say it.
Sigh...
It's not easy to say No. Among others, it requires
Wisdom
Knowing why is crucial
Diplomacy
Doing it right is critical
Tact
Knowing what not to say is important
Guts
Especially when it is to be uttered at the wrong time
And then I got interrupted and I forgot what I wanted to say. That's why it's important to know HOW TO SAY NO and WHEN to say it.
Sigh...
Monday, June 26, 2006
Moving House
Moving House
After agreeing to extend the lease of my current place for another 2 years, the new landlord (he acquired the shophouse from the former landlord, who, for personal reasons, had to sell the place) reneged on his part of the verbal agreement.
The landlord told me that his wife wanted to sell stuff at the shop space below and use the flat above as her "office". Initially, he said he would give us three months to look for a new place (i.e. move out by Aug 06), then when we called him again regarding paying HIM for utilities, he said that he wanted us out by the end of contract (i.e. mid Jul 06). This left me with no choice but to look for another place to stay. And fast!
So, the viewing began. After viewing enough houses and getting enough of uninhabitable places at exorbitant rental rates, my housemate and I decided to bite the bullet and go for a slightly more expensive place. The environment is a vast improvement over the current place, the place is about twice as big, the air is fresh and crisp, and the house is bright and airy. The rent is higher, of course, but it is just a tad more than what I would have to pay if I were to rent a place that is of the same floor area now. Go figure. I did and I reckoned this is a good deal. I guess I'll just spend less, travel less, eat less lavish stuff to top up the rent. (Fortunately, it is not really *that* bad.)
Just an aside: I only recently figured out that there are houseowners who actually rent their flats out to foreign workers. A three-room flat (68 square metres) on top of a shophouse (where I am putting up now) can command a price of $1200, accommodating 12 foreign workers. Don't ask me how but according to a four-room flat (91 square metres) owner, she used to rent her flat to 8 foreign workers (in name, but in reality, it's more like 16). What they did was: Morning shift sleep in house, evening shift work outfield; evening shift sleep in house, morning shift work outfield. Basically, the house is used by workers from 2 shifts. And she used to collect about $1300 for the place.
I've visited the place and it really looked like a refugee camp. How could almost everything be in shambles? Even the sides of a porcelain squatting toilet pan were shattered. The wall tiles cracked and hung precariously off the ceiling. And she tried to rent the place to my housemate and I for $1100. We both freaked out.
For posterity's sake, I'll briefly mention another case of a flat co-owner who backed out after the other co-owner, a 80-plus year old woman, said she wanted to go back to her place (to die?). And to make up for this unexpected twist of events, the housing agent sent us to view a house whose occupants left an oil-slick in the kitchen, and they left their house stinking so badly I could smell it 3 units away. I ticked the agent off and told her that I won't even rent the place for $300. I'd rather die homeless in the streets!
We've even checked out flats from commercial property management companies. The properties were not bad at all and better still, their rents are very reasonable. But our desired place (the rent is what we are paying now) did not have vacancies. So, we dragged ass till we simply had no time to leave bum prints on the ground any more.
Anyway, this flat that came along was a god-send. It just came on the papers for the first time, we were the first caller and we nailed it. Although it could do with a fresh coat of paint, some of the switches and handles are in need of replacement, and new SCV points needed to be installed, the landlord agreed to foot the bill for most of these (painting labour is on us, the tenants, but what the heck!).
In all, we're pleased with our new place and it gave us a new "lease of life". The landlord is a pleasant lady and who knows, one of us might end up owning this place in the end.
Sometimes, it is really true that "when god closes a door, he opens a window". In this case, I think he closed a shutter but made available a whole new world outside.
Afternote: Just last Saturday, I saw that the shophouse landlord had posted notices to invite rental for the entire shophouse. What a failure. Or is it henpecked, spineless amoeba? If he feels our rent had been very low, then discuss rental adjustments. Why evict us? But thankfully to him, we've found ourselves some place that is really great for living. And may I wish him no success in getting anyone to rent that place. May he pay finance instalments in vain for the next 100 months before he finds a willing taker! (I wonder if this AT LEAST matches the Arabic curse "May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpit" in terms of viciousness!)
After agreeing to extend the lease of my current place for another 2 years, the new landlord (he acquired the shophouse from the former landlord, who, for personal reasons, had to sell the place) reneged on his part of the verbal agreement.
The landlord told me that his wife wanted to sell stuff at the shop space below and use the flat above as her "office". Initially, he said he would give us three months to look for a new place (i.e. move out by Aug 06), then when we called him again regarding paying HIM for utilities, he said that he wanted us out by the end of contract (i.e. mid Jul 06). This left me with no choice but to look for another place to stay. And fast!
So, the viewing began. After viewing enough houses and getting enough of uninhabitable places at exorbitant rental rates, my housemate and I decided to bite the bullet and go for a slightly more expensive place. The environment is a vast improvement over the current place, the place is about twice as big, the air is fresh and crisp, and the house is bright and airy. The rent is higher, of course, but it is just a tad more than what I would have to pay if I were to rent a place that is of the same floor area now. Go figure. I did and I reckoned this is a good deal. I guess I'll just spend less, travel less, eat less lavish stuff to top up the rent. (Fortunately, it is not really *that* bad.)
Just an aside: I only recently figured out that there are houseowners who actually rent their flats out to foreign workers. A three-room flat (68 square metres) on top of a shophouse (where I am putting up now) can command a price of $1200, accommodating 12 foreign workers. Don't ask me how but according to a four-room flat (91 square metres) owner, she used to rent her flat to 8 foreign workers (in name, but in reality, it's more like 16). What they did was: Morning shift sleep in house, evening shift work outfield; evening shift sleep in house, morning shift work outfield. Basically, the house is used by workers from 2 shifts. And she used to collect about $1300 for the place.
I've visited the place and it really looked like a refugee camp. How could almost everything be in shambles? Even the sides of a porcelain squatting toilet pan were shattered. The wall tiles cracked and hung precariously off the ceiling. And she tried to rent the place to my housemate and I for $1100. We both freaked out.
For posterity's sake, I'll briefly mention another case of a flat co-owner who backed out after the other co-owner, a 80-plus year old woman, said she wanted to go back to her place (to die?). And to make up for this unexpected twist of events, the housing agent sent us to view a house whose occupants left an oil-slick in the kitchen, and they left their house stinking so badly I could smell it 3 units away. I ticked the agent off and told her that I won't even rent the place for $300. I'd rather die homeless in the streets!
We've even checked out flats from commercial property management companies. The properties were not bad at all and better still, their rents are very reasonable. But our desired place (the rent is what we are paying now) did not have vacancies. So, we dragged ass till we simply had no time to leave bum prints on the ground any more.
Anyway, this flat that came along was a god-send. It just came on the papers for the first time, we were the first caller and we nailed it. Although it could do with a fresh coat of paint, some of the switches and handles are in need of replacement, and new SCV points needed to be installed, the landlord agreed to foot the bill for most of these (painting labour is on us, the tenants, but what the heck!).
In all, we're pleased with our new place and it gave us a new "lease of life". The landlord is a pleasant lady and who knows, one of us might end up owning this place in the end.
Sometimes, it is really true that "when god closes a door, he opens a window". In this case, I think he closed a shutter but made available a whole new world outside.
Afternote: Just last Saturday, I saw that the shophouse landlord had posted notices to invite rental for the entire shophouse. What a failure. Or is it henpecked, spineless amoeba? If he feels our rent had been very low, then discuss rental adjustments. Why evict us? But thankfully to him, we've found ourselves some place that is really great for living. And may I wish him no success in getting anyone to rent that place. May he pay finance instalments in vain for the next 100 months before he finds a willing taker! (I wonder if this AT LEAST matches the Arabic curse "May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpit" in terms of viciousness!)
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Hardship Tour
Hardship Tour
1. After a 5 hour flight and another 5 hour bumpy bus ride, I knew I had bought the wrong tour.
2. I was nearly thrown off my bus seat on the second day when the bus when negotiating a particularly treacherous bend.
3. The views and sights were extraordinary. So was the difficulty in getting to see them.
4. Blogspot is banned in China - Go figure.
5. I am tanned.
6. Average day = 8 hours of bumping in the bus.
7. Food glorious WAIT! GORY food. Not good. Except the fiery Sichuan steamboat meal where they served pigs' large intestines, duck intestines, and duck blood "tofu". Yum! Fear factor? Bah!
8. Temperatures toggled between 7 and 40 degrees. Experienced my first heat wave in Yichang, one of the cauldrons of China. I am truly and wetly humbled.
9. Peaches, apricots, plums, cherries, and watermelons are in abundance, but not sweet enough yet.
10. Same old dishes meal after meal after meal...
1. After a 5 hour flight and another 5 hour bumpy bus ride, I knew I had bought the wrong tour.
2. I was nearly thrown off my bus seat on the second day when the bus when negotiating a particularly treacherous bend.
3. The views and sights were extraordinary. So was the difficulty in getting to see them.
4. Blogspot is banned in China - Go figure.
5. I am tanned.
6. Average day = 8 hours of bumping in the bus.
7. Food glorious WAIT! GORY food. Not good. Except the fiery Sichuan steamboat meal where they served pigs' large intestines, duck intestines, and duck blood "tofu". Yum! Fear factor? Bah!
8. Temperatures toggled between 7 and 40 degrees. Experienced my first heat wave in Yichang, one of the cauldrons of China. I am truly and wetly humbled.
9. Peaches, apricots, plums, cherries, and watermelons are in abundance, but not sweet enough yet.
10. Same old dishes meal after meal after meal...
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Period of Absence
Period of Absence
I'll be travelling in China from 10 - 21 Jun.
In the course of my travel, I'll be blogging wherever I can. However, I am not too hopeful that this would be at all possible.
I'll be in Jiuzhaigou and cruising down the 3 Gorges Dam.
More when I return.
I'll be travelling in China from 10 - 21 Jun.
In the course of my travel, I'll be blogging wherever I can. However, I am not too hopeful that this would be at all possible.
I'll be in Jiuzhaigou and cruising down the 3 Gorges Dam.
More when I return.
Friday, June 02, 2006
Top 10 Questions
Top 10 Questions
(In no order of merit)
1. Can a person smell his/her own BO?
2. Does a drunk know s/he is drunk?
3. How do you make a Down syndrome's sufferer feel "up" (i.e. happy, high-spirited)?
4. If the brain feels no pain, then why do people suffer HEADaches?
5. Are dogs plain forgiving or absolutely amnesiac?
6. Why don't oppressed characters in shows or movies speak up?
7. How do we know we don't know what we don't know?
8. If there is a fleeting moment when the intercourse is enjoyed, is it still rape?
9. Who discovered milk?
10. When a human being stop being, is s/he still human?
Answers: Option A By Al
1. Sadly, too often, no.
2. Yes, but we/they don't care.
3. I'm sure there are porn sites for that.
4. You'd know better than I would.
5. I'd bet on amnesiac, but I'm a cat-person.
6. That question has caused me no end of frustration.
7. We don't. We're just screwed.
8. It's always rape. Haven't you heard of Katherine McKinnon?
9. See answer #3.
10. I vote no.
Old Whig | Homepage | 06.03.06 - 3:05 am | #
Answers: Option B By Quinsy
1. Yes they can!
2. Yes, they do know.
3. Pop Prozac?
4. Cuz it's HEADache. NOT BRAIN ACHE.
5. They are Amnesiac. Or just too lazy to remember. Unless they get rewarded with doggy treats and a back rub.
6. They do speak up... only during the last few episodes when the produces are tired of dragging the stories.
7. We know we don't know what we don't know when others talk about it and we realise we're CLUELESS.
8. It is still rape cuz the person did not consent BEFORE the intercourse.
9. Humans. They discovered milk and called it milk.
10. Yes. Still human.
Quinsy | Homepage | 06.05.06 - 9:03 am | #
Answers: Option C By Probligo
1. I can smell my feet after being in boots for 12 hours - without taking the boots off. Does that count?
2. Yes, when I pass out I can't drink any more.
3. Try asking - I am sure they could tell you. Seriously!
4. Didn't you know that they are contagious?
5. Have dogs got enough brain that they have anything to forget?
6. Ditto to Al.
7. Anyone with more brain than a dog could work that out.
8. Intercourse is not rape. Rape is not intercourse. Oxymoron.
9. Cats.
10. Say what? Ain't nothin after bein'.
probligo | Homepage | 06.09.06 - 11:38 pm | #
(In no order of merit)
1. Can a person smell his/her own BO?
2. Does a drunk know s/he is drunk?
3. How do you make a Down syndrome's sufferer feel "up" (i.e. happy, high-spirited)?
4. If the brain feels no pain, then why do people suffer HEADaches?
5. Are dogs plain forgiving or absolutely amnesiac?
6. Why don't oppressed characters in shows or movies speak up?
7. How do we know we don't know what we don't know?
8. If there is a fleeting moment when the intercourse is enjoyed, is it still rape?
9. Who discovered milk?
10. When a human being stop being, is s/he still human?
Answers: Option A By Al
1. Sadly, too often, no.
2. Yes, but we/they don't care.
3. I'm sure there are porn sites for that.
4. You'd know better than I would.
5. I'd bet on amnesiac, but I'm a cat-person.
6. That question has caused me no end of frustration.
7. We don't. We're just screwed.
8. It's always rape. Haven't you heard of Katherine McKinnon?
9. See answer #3.
10. I vote no.
Old Whig | Homepage | 06.03.06 - 3:05 am | #
Answers: Option B By Quinsy
1. Yes they can!
2. Yes, they do know.
3. Pop Prozac?
4. Cuz it's HEADache. NOT BRAIN ACHE.
5. They are Amnesiac. Or just too lazy to remember. Unless they get rewarded with doggy treats and a back rub.
6. They do speak up... only during the last few episodes when the produces are tired of dragging the stories.
7. We know we don't know what we don't know when others talk about it and we realise we're CLUELESS.
8. It is still rape cuz the person did not consent BEFORE the intercourse.
9. Humans. They discovered milk and called it milk.
10. Yes. Still human.
Quinsy | Homepage | 06.05.06 - 9:03 am | #
Answers: Option C By Probligo
1. I can smell my feet after being in boots for 12 hours - without taking the boots off. Does that count?
2. Yes, when I pass out I can't drink any more.
3. Try asking - I am sure they could tell you. Seriously!
4. Didn't you know that they are contagious?
5. Have dogs got enough brain that they have anything to forget?
6. Ditto to Al.
7. Anyone with more brain than a dog could work that out.
8. Intercourse is not rape. Rape is not intercourse. Oxymoron.
9. Cats.
10. Say what? Ain't nothin after bein'.
probligo | Homepage | 06.09.06 - 11:38 pm | #
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Duan Wu Festival
Duan Wu Festival
It's Duan Wu Festival today. Just thought I'll share a short entry from Wikipedia explaining the history behind the festival.
Qu Yuan was a minister in the government of the state of Chu, descended of nobility and a champion of political loyalty and truth eager to maintain the Chu state's sovereignty. Qu Yuan advocated a policy of alliance with the other kingdoms of the period against the hegemonic state of Qin, which threatened to dominate them all. The Chu king, however, fell under the influence of other corrupt, jealous ministers who slandered Qu Yuan, and banished his most loyal counselor. It is said that Qu Yuan returned first to his family's home town. In his exile, he spent much of this time collecting legends and rearranging folk odes while travelling the countryside, producing some of the greatest poetry in Chinese literature while expressing his fervent love for his state and his deepest concern for its future.
According to legend, his anxiety brought him to an increasingly troubled state of health; during his depression, he would often take walks near a certain well, during which he would look upon his reflection in the water and be his own person, thin and gaunt. In the legend, this well became known as the "Face Reflection Well." Today on a hillside in Xiangluping in Hubei province's Zigui, there is a well which is considered to be the original well from the time of Qu Yuan.
In 278 BC, learning of the capture of his country's capital, Ying, by General Bai Qi of the state of Qin, Qu Yuan is said to have written the lengthy poem of lamentation called "Lament for Ying" and later to have waded into the Miluo river in today's Hunan Province holding a great rock in order to commit ritual suicide as a form of protest against the corruption of the era.
The origin of the Duanwu Festival
Local people, learning of his suicide, rushed out in their fishing boats to the middle of the river and desperately tried to save him, but were unsuccessful. In order to keep fish and evil spirits away from his body, they beat drums and splashed the water with their paddles. They threw rice into the water as a food offering to Qu Yuan and to distract the fish away from his body. However, late one night, the spirit of Qu Yuan appeared before his friends and told them that the rice meant for him was being intercepted by a huge river dragon. He asked his friends to wrap their rice into three-cornered silk packages to ward off the dragon. These packages became a traditional food known as zongzi, although the lumps of rice are now wrapped in bamboo leaves instead of silk. The act of racing to search for his body in boats gradually became the cultural tradition of dragon boat racing, which is held on the anniversary of his death every year.
Today, people still eat rice dumplings and participate in dragon boat races to commemorate Qu Yuan's sacrifice on the Duan Wu festival, the fifth day of the fifth month of the Chinese lunar calendar. This year (2006) it is 31/5 in the solar calendar.
Reputation
Qu Yuan is generally recognized as the first great Chinese poet with record. He initiated the style of Sao, which is named after his work Li Sao, in which he abandoned the classic four-character verses used in poems of Shi Jing and adopted verses with varying lengths, which gives the poem more rhythm and latitude in expression. Qu Yuan is also regarded as one of the most prominent figures of Romanticism in Chinese literature, and his masterpieces influenced some of the greatest Romanticist poets in Tang Dynasty such as Li Bai and Du Fu.
Other than his literary influence, Qu Yuan is also held as the earliest patriotic poet in China history. His political idealism and unbendable patriotism have served as the model for Chinese intellectuals until today.
It's Duan Wu Festival today. Just thought I'll share a short entry from Wikipedia explaining the history behind the festival.
Qu Yuan was a minister in the government of the state of Chu, descended of nobility and a champion of political loyalty and truth eager to maintain the Chu state's sovereignty. Qu Yuan advocated a policy of alliance with the other kingdoms of the period against the hegemonic state of Qin, which threatened to dominate them all. The Chu king, however, fell under the influence of other corrupt, jealous ministers who slandered Qu Yuan, and banished his most loyal counselor. It is said that Qu Yuan returned first to his family's home town. In his exile, he spent much of this time collecting legends and rearranging folk odes while travelling the countryside, producing some of the greatest poetry in Chinese literature while expressing his fervent love for his state and his deepest concern for its future.
According to legend, his anxiety brought him to an increasingly troubled state of health; during his depression, he would often take walks near a certain well, during which he would look upon his reflection in the water and be his own person, thin and gaunt. In the legend, this well became known as the "Face Reflection Well." Today on a hillside in Xiangluping in Hubei province's Zigui, there is a well which is considered to be the original well from the time of Qu Yuan.
In 278 BC, learning of the capture of his country's capital, Ying, by General Bai Qi of the state of Qin, Qu Yuan is said to have written the lengthy poem of lamentation called "Lament for Ying" and later to have waded into the Miluo river in today's Hunan Province holding a great rock in order to commit ritual suicide as a form of protest against the corruption of the era.
The origin of the Duanwu Festival
Local people, learning of his suicide, rushed out in their fishing boats to the middle of the river and desperately tried to save him, but were unsuccessful. In order to keep fish and evil spirits away from his body, they beat drums and splashed the water with their paddles. They threw rice into the water as a food offering to Qu Yuan and to distract the fish away from his body. However, late one night, the spirit of Qu Yuan appeared before his friends and told them that the rice meant for him was being intercepted by a huge river dragon. He asked his friends to wrap their rice into three-cornered silk packages to ward off the dragon. These packages became a traditional food known as zongzi, although the lumps of rice are now wrapped in bamboo leaves instead of silk. The act of racing to search for his body in boats gradually became the cultural tradition of dragon boat racing, which is held on the anniversary of his death every year.
Today, people still eat rice dumplings and participate in dragon boat races to commemorate Qu Yuan's sacrifice on the Duan Wu festival, the fifth day of the fifth month of the Chinese lunar calendar. This year (2006) it is 31/5 in the solar calendar.
Reputation
Qu Yuan is generally recognized as the first great Chinese poet with record. He initiated the style of Sao, which is named after his work Li Sao, in which he abandoned the classic four-character verses used in poems of Shi Jing and adopted verses with varying lengths, which gives the poem more rhythm and latitude in expression. Qu Yuan is also regarded as one of the most prominent figures of Romanticism in Chinese literature, and his masterpieces influenced some of the greatest Romanticist poets in Tang Dynasty such as Li Bai and Du Fu.
Other than his literary influence, Qu Yuan is also held as the earliest patriotic poet in China history. His political idealism and unbendable patriotism have served as the model for Chinese intellectuals until today.
My Top Ten Wishes
My Top Ten Wishes
You are free to suggest what I should consider changing. :-) However, I must add that all these have the POTENTIAL to become reality.
Number 10
Real life Happy Tree Friends events
Number 9
Cigarettes that are filterless and do not give out second-hand smoke (i.e. smokers inhale the smoke and this gets entirely absorbed into the body)
Number 8
Parents who really discipline their kids and not just present empty threats
Number 7
Considerate drivers
Number 6
Faster commercial transportation means at cheaper travelling costs
Number 5
Sky high taxes for owners of multiple houses and cars OR
Cheap rent for owners of no houses and no cars (Not quite achievable)
Number 4
-Still Thinking-
Alcohol that does not make people drunk or puke or even suffer hangovers? I'd prefer to have the ability to achieve orgasm an infinite number of, ok 20, times a night without fatigue or rawness. Hahaha.... But it's not quite achievable.
You are free to suggest what I should consider changing. :-) However, I must add that all these have the POTENTIAL to become reality.
Number 10
Real life Happy Tree Friends events
Number 9
Cigarettes that are filterless and do not give out second-hand smoke (i.e. smokers inhale the smoke and this gets entirely absorbed into the body)
Number 8
Parents who really discipline their kids and not just present empty threats
Number 7
Considerate drivers
Number 6
Faster commercial transportation means at cheaper travelling costs
Number 5
Sky high taxes for owners of multiple houses and cars OR
Cheap rent for owners of no houses and no cars (Not quite achievable)
Number 4
-Still Thinking-
Alcohol that does not make people drunk or puke or even suffer hangovers? I'd prefer to have the ability to achieve orgasm an infinite number of, ok 20, times a night without fatigue or rawness. Hahaha.... But it's not quite achievable.
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Few Articles
Few Articles
A few reasons why I've not been writing a lot these days.
Ear Surgery
I detected a mass in my right ear recently. It was causing pain and pressing against my jaw nerves. Saw my family doctor 25 May. He won't touch the mass and referred me to the Polyclinic for referral to the Specialist. So, spent an entire afternoon at the Polyclinic to see a doctor who won't touch the mass and he finally referred me to the Ear Nose Throat Centre at the Singapore General Hospital. Finally yesterday, I saw the specialist who, after less than 5 minutes of asking me what's wrong, plonked me on the operating chair and snipped out the mass WITHOUT anaesthesia. I was so badly in pain.
Neither he nor I know what the mass was. He returned it to me, I gave it to the dustbin. Now waiting to see if it recurs.
Eviction
Househunting has taken up most of my waking hours. I've not found a place within budget.
China Trip
I'm leaving for the Three Gorges Cruise and Jiuzhaigou from 10 to 20 Jun. I should be happily looking forward to the trip, but hell no! Not until the house is settled will I really feel the relief to enjoy a trip. But since I've already paid for it, I'm leaving regardless.
Work
One word: Madness.
Upcoming work trip in Jul
I'm coordinating this trip from SIN - LAX - DEN - SAF - DEN - LAX - SFO - DAC - EWR - SIN beginning 10 Jul. The number of places to visit, flights to take, and meetings to attend and write notes for are KILLING. The organisation of the trip and the attempting to meet with the identified people has been enervating. See work.
Work I could have otherwise been exempted
Self-explanatory. There are simply too many things where my attendance could be spared. But hell, no! I'm required to turn up any way. So where and how and when the hell will work get done?
Sleep
I've cut that down by a lot already. But I'm still not getting enough and to get as close to enough as possible, many things need to be left aside. For instance, no blogging. I've even cut down on watching television - hey! I found out Taylor Hicks won from a friend, after my consultation with my family doctor on 25 May. I was on his car. Duh-ness!
Food
I've been eating so terribly ordinarily these days because I don't have no time for mah fancy restaurants servin' good food. It's come to a point that even dumplings (which give me GREAT discomfort as I can't digest glutinous rice) have become normal meals. I simply have no time to eat anything else. And I've been having more stomachaches and bowel problems than normal.
Coffee
Well, excessive coffee makes me shake uncontrollably and I am mentally hyperactive when I shake. So, what happens is that I can't write because I can't concentrate on writing. My mind wanders and catch interesting glimpses of many things that I promise I will blog about but never getting to do so. I think I need to keep a journal to jot these down soon.
Cell phone
The curse of roaming cell phones. The darned thing never stops ringing and it's been causing great trauma to my ears and mental well-being, especially when each call means more work is added on the plate.
Email
More and more and more emails are flooding my inbox and that means attention is channelled there to resolve the outstanding issues. What the heck.
Conclusion
Why is it I simply have no time for myself any more?
A few reasons why I've not been writing a lot these days.
Ear Surgery
I detected a mass in my right ear recently. It was causing pain and pressing against my jaw nerves. Saw my family doctor 25 May. He won't touch the mass and referred me to the Polyclinic for referral to the Specialist. So, spent an entire afternoon at the Polyclinic to see a doctor who won't touch the mass and he finally referred me to the Ear Nose Throat Centre at the Singapore General Hospital. Finally yesterday, I saw the specialist who, after less than 5 minutes of asking me what's wrong, plonked me on the operating chair and snipped out the mass WITHOUT anaesthesia. I was so badly in pain.
Neither he nor I know what the mass was. He returned it to me, I gave it to the dustbin. Now waiting to see if it recurs.
Eviction
Househunting has taken up most of my waking hours. I've not found a place within budget.
China Trip
I'm leaving for the Three Gorges Cruise and Jiuzhaigou from 10 to 20 Jun. I should be happily looking forward to the trip, but hell no! Not until the house is settled will I really feel the relief to enjoy a trip. But since I've already paid for it, I'm leaving regardless.
Work
One word: Madness.
Upcoming work trip in Jul
I'm coordinating this trip from SIN - LAX - DEN - SAF - DEN - LAX - SFO - DAC - EWR - SIN beginning 10 Jul. The number of places to visit, flights to take, and meetings to attend and write notes for are KILLING. The organisation of the trip and the attempting to meet with the identified people has been enervating. See work.
Work I could have otherwise been exempted
Self-explanatory. There are simply too many things where my attendance could be spared. But hell, no! I'm required to turn up any way. So where and how and when the hell will work get done?
Sleep
I've cut that down by a lot already. But I'm still not getting enough and to get as close to enough as possible, many things need to be left aside. For instance, no blogging. I've even cut down on watching television - hey! I found out Taylor Hicks won from a friend, after my consultation with my family doctor on 25 May. I was on his car. Duh-ness!
Food
I've been eating so terribly ordinarily these days because I don't have no time for mah fancy restaurants servin' good food. It's come to a point that even dumplings (which give me GREAT discomfort as I can't digest glutinous rice) have become normal meals. I simply have no time to eat anything else. And I've been having more stomachaches and bowel problems than normal.
Coffee
Well, excessive coffee makes me shake uncontrollably and I am mentally hyperactive when I shake. So, what happens is that I can't write because I can't concentrate on writing. My mind wanders and catch interesting glimpses of many things that I promise I will blog about but never getting to do so. I think I need to keep a journal to jot these down soon.
Cell phone
The curse of roaming cell phones. The darned thing never stops ringing and it's been causing great trauma to my ears and mental well-being, especially when each call means more work is added on the plate.
More and more and more emails are flooding my inbox and that means attention is channelled there to resolve the outstanding issues. What the heck.
Conclusion
Why is it I simply have no time for myself any more?
Friday, May 26, 2006
Da Vinci Code
Da Vinci Code
Heard somewhere that the Da Vinci Code recouped its capital in 4 days.
I guess the Vatican can eat their hearts out.
Heard somewhere that the Da Vinci Code recouped its capital in 4 days.
I guess the Vatican can eat their hearts out.
Monday, May 22, 2006
Men & Women
Men & Women
You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.
-------------------------------------------
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
-------------------------------------------
A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted"
Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine!"
-------------------------------------------
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
-------------------------------------------
A man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
-------------------------------------------
A little boy asked his father,
"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying."
------------------------------------------
A young son asked, "Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."
-------------------------------------------
Then there was a woman who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late."
-------------------------------------------
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
-------------------------------------------
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.
-------------------------------------------
Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
-------------------------------------------
First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."
-------------------------------------------
A Woman's Prayer
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man, to love and to forgive him, and for Patience, for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll just beat him to death.
-------------------------------------------
AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!
Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus.
So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy."
The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus. So shut the hell up."
You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.
-------------------------------------------
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
-------------------------------------------
A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted"
Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine!"
-------------------------------------------
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
-------------------------------------------
A man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
-------------------------------------------
A little boy asked his father,
"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying."
------------------------------------------
A young son asked, "Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."
-------------------------------------------
Then there was a woman who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late."
-------------------------------------------
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
-------------------------------------------
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.
-------------------------------------------
Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
-------------------------------------------
First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."
-------------------------------------------
A Woman's Prayer
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man, to love and to forgive him, and for Patience, for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll just beat him to death.
-------------------------------------------
AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!
Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus.
So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy."
The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus. So shut the hell up."
House Hunting
House Hunting
Just 3 factors:
Location
Price
Furnishing (I need it unfurnished)
And the shortlist of houses/apartments/flats all failed to make the cut.
It's like the basic laws of economics.
If it is convenient and cheap, it is furnished. (Haven't found one.)
If it is convenient and unfurnished, it is not cheap. (many many places)
If it is cheap and unfurnished, it is not convenient. (several places)
If it is cheap and convenient and unfurnished, it is beside a live seafood dealer whose produce makes the entire house stink. (one place)
I'm devoting my after-work waking hours searching. It's like seeking the perfect woman (doesn't exist - don't protest! See the PS.) or the perfect job (doesn't exist) or the...
PS.
Shortest fairy tale: A man asked a woman to marry him. She said no. He lived happily ever after.
Just 3 factors:
Location
Price
Furnishing (I need it unfurnished)
And the shortlist of houses/apartments/flats all failed to make the cut.
It's like the basic laws of economics.
If it is convenient and cheap, it is furnished. (Haven't found one.)
If it is convenient and unfurnished, it is not cheap. (many many places)
If it is cheap and unfurnished, it is not convenient. (several places)
If it is cheap and convenient and unfurnished, it is beside a live seafood dealer whose produce makes the entire house stink. (one place)
I'm devoting my after-work waking hours searching. It's like seeking the perfect woman (doesn't exist - don't protest! See the PS.) or the perfect job (doesn't exist) or the...
PS.
Shortest fairy tale: A man asked a woman to marry him. She said no. He lived happily ever after.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
The Da Vinci Code
The Da Vinci Code
[See associated entry, The Da Vinci Cod, in Teflon Rants.]
Watched DVC on 19 May. 9.15pm show. Watched it at Jurong East.
NEVER EVER WATCH ANYTHING AT JURONG EAST. It is about the most backwater cinema I've ever visited. It's even worse than surviving those lascivious Chee Koh Peks (wah, I even make it sound like a proper name!) at Yang-tze.
I remember I watched the Kamasutra at Yang-tze and the old men were all complaining about the time it took for the lead actress to turn around after stripping. And also for the male lead to show it all. They were loudly cursing about paying to watch nudity but not seeing any. Then, as a 21 year old undergraduate, I thought it baseless and crass. Looking back, hey! These folks probably slogged their lives away building Singapore. For all I know, many of them hadn't have the money to see anything stark naked, except in the cinemas (thank you for the R(A) rating!). So I told myself I'm not watching no f*ck-fest at Yang-tze again. Never am I going to be caught there. Not at least till I'm taking Viagra to keep it up. Oh, never mind.
Jurong East is bad. Bad bad bad. The toilet had a lingering stale stench of piss and sweat. It's like having a bunch of super-sweaty men inside there peeing millions of gallons into the urinals and letting their stinky sweat permeate, no, make that replace, the entire atmosphere of odourless air to sweat infused air. The cinema was old and the aircon was probably turned on most minimally.
I wonder why I had to be sweating in a 40% (or maybe less) filled cinema, wondering when my next waft of cool air will come (it never did!). The partially reclining seat was old and the cushion was worn out. Again, I have a painful butt one hour into a 150 minute agony fest. The show was slow.
DVC stayed true to the book. The book was great. But not all great books make great movies. Just like not many great movies make great reading stuff. The screenplay adapter probably needs to relearn his craft. Dan Brown writes rivetingly. But the long-haired Tom Hanks needed to realise that DVC is not Forrest Gump in France. His facial expression moved from looking mildly scared and mildly bewildered, if you could tell the difference at all.
Tatou, the female lead, was an intelligent bimbo. Or bimbotic genius. You choose. I can't which was which. When I read a report on the choice of Tatou to shut the French Press (not for making coffee) up, I had a hunch that it's going to be a yawn (without the coffee). I mean, I have yet to figure how a person could be so methodical in acting that she knew what to do at certain times and entirely clueless at others.
Only thing that made me sit up? When her car's side mirror was knocked off by a rubbish truck. That's the only time I felt any anguish - the car acted well.
The supposed albino who applied torture devices on himself forgot his red contact lenses (albinos have red eyes owing to lack of pigments) and the torture was not harsh enough. I mean, the Chinese do better when interrogating suspects. Place him through a round of interrogation and he'll probably wish he was whipping himself in his own balls (for it would have been less painful).
The plot was great on paper. Somehow, it was great on paper. But on screen, the combination of people simply didn't seem to work.
The on-screen chemistry was absent. Terribly absent.
Fache was a pathetic excuse for a French bulldog. My toy dog can be more ruthless than that.
By the time they reached the safe deposit box place at 24 Whatever Road, my butt was so painful and I was already so irritated by the prostitute in front of me that I was contemplating if I should say what each actor was going to do next.
Then I remembered that most of the audience would have read the book.
[See associated entry, The Da Vinci Cod, in Teflon Rants.]
Watched DVC on 19 May. 9.15pm show. Watched it at Jurong East.
NEVER EVER WATCH ANYTHING AT JURONG EAST. It is about the most backwater cinema I've ever visited. It's even worse than surviving those lascivious Chee Koh Peks (wah, I even make it sound like a proper name!) at Yang-tze.
I remember I watched the Kamasutra at Yang-tze and the old men were all complaining about the time it took for the lead actress to turn around after stripping. And also for the male lead to show it all. They were loudly cursing about paying to watch nudity but not seeing any. Then, as a 21 year old undergraduate, I thought it baseless and crass. Looking back, hey! These folks probably slogged their lives away building Singapore. For all I know, many of them hadn't have the money to see anything stark naked, except in the cinemas (thank you for the R(A) rating!). So I told myself I'm not watching no f*ck-fest at Yang-tze again. Never am I going to be caught there. Not at least till I'm taking Viagra to keep it up. Oh, never mind.
Jurong East is bad. Bad bad bad. The toilet had a lingering stale stench of piss and sweat. It's like having a bunch of super-sweaty men inside there peeing millions of gallons into the urinals and letting their stinky sweat permeate, no, make that replace, the entire atmosphere of odourless air to sweat infused air. The cinema was old and the aircon was probably turned on most minimally.
I wonder why I had to be sweating in a 40% (or maybe less) filled cinema, wondering when my next waft of cool air will come (it never did!). The partially reclining seat was old and the cushion was worn out. Again, I have a painful butt one hour into a 150 minute agony fest. The show was slow.
DVC stayed true to the book. The book was great. But not all great books make great movies. Just like not many great movies make great reading stuff. The screenplay adapter probably needs to relearn his craft. Dan Brown writes rivetingly. But the long-haired Tom Hanks needed to realise that DVC is not Forrest Gump in France. His facial expression moved from looking mildly scared and mildly bewildered, if you could tell the difference at all.
Tatou, the female lead, was an intelligent bimbo. Or bimbotic genius. You choose. I can't which was which. When I read a report on the choice of Tatou to shut the French Press (not for making coffee) up, I had a hunch that it's going to be a yawn (without the coffee). I mean, I have yet to figure how a person could be so methodical in acting that she knew what to do at certain times and entirely clueless at others.
Only thing that made me sit up? When her car's side mirror was knocked off by a rubbish truck. That's the only time I felt any anguish - the car acted well.
The supposed albino who applied torture devices on himself forgot his red contact lenses (albinos have red eyes owing to lack of pigments) and the torture was not harsh enough. I mean, the Chinese do better when interrogating suspects. Place him through a round of interrogation and he'll probably wish he was whipping himself in his own balls (for it would have been less painful).
The plot was great on paper. Somehow, it was great on paper. But on screen, the combination of people simply didn't seem to work.
The on-screen chemistry was absent. Terribly absent.
Fache was a pathetic excuse for a French bulldog. My toy dog can be more ruthless than that.
By the time they reached the safe deposit box place at 24 Whatever Road, my butt was so painful and I was already so irritated by the prostitute in front of me that I was contemplating if I should say what each actor was going to do next.
Then I remembered that most of the audience would have read the book.
Friday, May 19, 2006
Entry from 22 Sep 05
Entry from 22 Sep 05
Someone alerted me to Mr Brown's podcast recently in a similar vein. I don't doubt that it could be original work, even if the resemblence is uncanny. Still, I feel that the Brown show has become crassier. A little sad, because I believe he could and should maintain the high standards, even if it means fewer podcasts.
I go for quality any time.
Pretty Woman's Husband's Revenge
Act 1 Scene 1
Little girl sees dove flies across the sky. She remembers that her brother is going away.
Act 1 Scene 2
Little girl runs like mad to release some birds. On the way, she knocked over a hawker who's oranges fell all over.
Hawker: Aiyoyoh! Vai you knock my oranges all over, deh?
Little girl glances back and pretends not to understand.
Act 1 Scene 3
Little girl knocks over bamboos. Luckily this time, the bamboo hawker was not around or the credit card company will have to pay an additional few million dollars in advertising time.
Act 2 Scene 1
Little girl knocks into Pretty Woman's Husband, who's travelling with his guide. Little girl pretends that she's innocent and stopped by the bird hawker.
Pretty Woman's Husband (in his heart): -Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!- Blind ah!?
Of course, being so famous, must keep that smile on the face and act cool.
Girl: Five birds. My brother is going away today and I want to bring him good luck.
Little girl passes the money to Bird Hawker. Bird Hawker looks at the money he received.
Bird Hawker: You only have enough for one bird. (Ok, don't think dirty here!)
Girl (shaking her head): Ok.
Little girl grabs a cage with a dove inside and ran.
Act 3
Pretty Woman's Husband looks at Little girl running off and a brilliant idea comes to his mind. Taking out his wonderful credit card, he passes it to the bird hawker and winks. The bird hawker nods knowingly.
Act 4
Pretty Woman's Husband and bird hawkers brought cages and cages of birds and arrive by the sea side. They release the birds.
Pretty Woman's Husband (in his heart): -Beep!- You knock into me and still so yah yah papaya. -Beep! Beep! Beep!- What the -Beep! Beep!- Watch out ah! I bet all my birds on your bird that your wish will not come true.
[A friend provided an alternative, which is a pun on some credit cards which are meant only for the fairer sex.
Pretty Woman's Husband: The bitch do(es)n't get it.]
As though there is telepathy, Little girl looks accusingly at Pretty Woman's Husband, although she tries to look innocent at the same time.
Pretty Woman's Husband immediately shrugs his sholder and the hawkers shake their heads.
THE END
Someone alerted me to Mr Brown's podcast recently in a similar vein. I don't doubt that it could be original work, even if the resemblence is uncanny. Still, I feel that the Brown show has become crassier. A little sad, because I believe he could and should maintain the high standards, even if it means fewer podcasts.
I go for quality any time.
Pretty Woman's Husband's Revenge
Act 1 Scene 1
Little girl sees dove flies across the sky. She remembers that her brother is going away.
Act 1 Scene 2
Little girl runs like mad to release some birds. On the way, she knocked over a hawker who's oranges fell all over.
Hawker: Aiyoyoh! Vai you knock my oranges all over, deh?
Little girl glances back and pretends not to understand.
Act 1 Scene 3
Little girl knocks over bamboos. Luckily this time, the bamboo hawker was not around or the credit card company will have to pay an additional few million dollars in advertising time.
Act 2 Scene 1
Little girl knocks into Pretty Woman's Husband, who's travelling with his guide. Little girl pretends that she's innocent and stopped by the bird hawker.
Pretty Woman's Husband (in his heart): -Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!- Blind ah!?
Of course, being so famous, must keep that smile on the face and act cool.
Girl: Five birds. My brother is going away today and I want to bring him good luck.
Little girl passes the money to Bird Hawker. Bird Hawker looks at the money he received.
Bird Hawker: You only have enough for one bird. (Ok, don't think dirty here!)
Girl (shaking her head): Ok.
Little girl grabs a cage with a dove inside and ran.
Act 3
Pretty Woman's Husband looks at Little girl running off and a brilliant idea comes to his mind. Taking out his wonderful credit card, he passes it to the bird hawker and winks. The bird hawker nods knowingly.
Act 4
Pretty Woman's Husband and bird hawkers brought cages and cages of birds and arrive by the sea side. They release the birds.
Pretty Woman's Husband (in his heart): -Beep!- You knock into me and still so yah yah papaya. -Beep! Beep! Beep!- What the -Beep! Beep!- Watch out ah! I bet all my birds on your bird that your wish will not come true.
[A friend provided an alternative, which is a pun on some credit cards which are meant only for the fairer sex.
Pretty Woman's Husband: The bitch do(es)n't get it.]
As though there is telepathy, Little girl looks accusingly at Pretty Woman's Husband, although she tries to look innocent at the same time.
Pretty Woman's Husband immediately shrugs his sholder and the hawkers shake their heads.
THE END
Thursday, May 18, 2006
What is the link between alcohol and cancer risk?
What is the link between alcohol and cancer risk?
According to the expert report from the American Institute for Cancer Research, Food, Nutrition and the Prevention of Cancer: a Global Perspective, there is convincing evidence that alcohol increase the risk of cancer of the mouth, pharynx, larynx and esophagus. The risk of upper respiratory tract cancer is greatly increased if drinkers also smoke. Alcohol also increase the risk of liver cancer and probably increases the risk for colon, rectal and breast cancer.
How does drinking alcohol increase cancer risk?
When you drink alcohol, the sensitive tissues of your upper-respiratory tract are directly exposed to alcohol in beverages, causing damage to cells and possibly initiating cancer. Cancer of the liver is probably preceded by alcoholic liver cirrhosis which develops after years of drinking. There is less known about how drinking alcohol affects the development of other cancers.
What can I do to lower my cancer risk?
One thing you can do is choose not to drink alcohol, or choose to drink them only in moderation. That's no more than 2 drinks per day for men and 1 for women.
1 drink = 1 bottle or can of beer (12 oz)
1 small glass of wine (5 oz)
1 shot of 80 proof liquor (1.5 oz)
Why is the recommended limit different for women and men?
Alcohol affects women and men differently. A woman's body has more fat and less muscle than a man's. Alcohol can be diluted into water-holding muscle tissue, but not into fat tissue. Therefore alcohol cannot be diluted as quickly in her body as in his. Also, a woman cannot metabolize alcohol as quickly as a man. Therefore, alcohol stays in her bloodstream longer.
Does drinking present special risks for women?
The risk for developing breast cancer, the second most common cancer in women in the States, rises with increased alcohol consumption. Women at a high risk for breast cancer should consider not drinking. Women develop alcohol-related health problems, such as cirrhosis of the liver, faster then men who drink the same amount. Finally, alcohol can severely injure a pregnant woman's unborn child.
Is it true that drinking alcohol can lower my risk for heart disease?
There is evidence that drinking modest amounts of alcohol is associated with a lower risk for coronary heart disease in men, and perhaps women. For more details, read Red Wine - Health Benefits? However, drinking higher amounts of alcohol raises the risk of cancer along with risks for high blood pressure, stroke, heart disease, birth defects, inflammation of the pancreas, damage to the brain and heart, malnutrition, osteoporosis, accidents, violence and suicide. There are better ways to decrease your heart disease risk, including exercising, reaching and maintaining a healthy weight, lowering saturated fats and trans fats in your diet, controlling blood pressure and not smoking.
Taken from http://www.healthcastle.com/alcoholandcancer.shtml
According to the expert report from the American Institute for Cancer Research, Food, Nutrition and the Prevention of Cancer: a Global Perspective, there is convincing evidence that alcohol increase the risk of cancer of the mouth, pharynx, larynx and esophagus. The risk of upper respiratory tract cancer is greatly increased if drinkers also smoke. Alcohol also increase the risk of liver cancer and probably increases the risk for colon, rectal and breast cancer.
How does drinking alcohol increase cancer risk?
When you drink alcohol, the sensitive tissues of your upper-respiratory tract are directly exposed to alcohol in beverages, causing damage to cells and possibly initiating cancer. Cancer of the liver is probably preceded by alcoholic liver cirrhosis which develops after years of drinking. There is less known about how drinking alcohol affects the development of other cancers.
What can I do to lower my cancer risk?
One thing you can do is choose not to drink alcohol, or choose to drink them only in moderation. That's no more than 2 drinks per day for men and 1 for women.
1 drink = 1 bottle or can of beer (12 oz)
1 small glass of wine (5 oz)
1 shot of 80 proof liquor (1.5 oz)
Why is the recommended limit different for women and men?
Alcohol affects women and men differently. A woman's body has more fat and less muscle than a man's. Alcohol can be diluted into water-holding muscle tissue, but not into fat tissue. Therefore alcohol cannot be diluted as quickly in her body as in his. Also, a woman cannot metabolize alcohol as quickly as a man. Therefore, alcohol stays in her bloodstream longer.
Does drinking present special risks for women?
The risk for developing breast cancer, the second most common cancer in women in the States, rises with increased alcohol consumption. Women at a high risk for breast cancer should consider not drinking. Women develop alcohol-related health problems, such as cirrhosis of the liver, faster then men who drink the same amount. Finally, alcohol can severely injure a pregnant woman's unborn child.
Is it true that drinking alcohol can lower my risk for heart disease?
There is evidence that drinking modest amounts of alcohol is associated with a lower risk for coronary heart disease in men, and perhaps women. For more details, read Red Wine - Health Benefits? However, drinking higher amounts of alcohol raises the risk of cancer along with risks for high blood pressure, stroke, heart disease, birth defects, inflammation of the pancreas, damage to the brain and heart, malnutrition, osteoporosis, accidents, violence and suicide. There are better ways to decrease your heart disease risk, including exercising, reaching and maintaining a healthy weight, lowering saturated fats and trans fats in your diet, controlling blood pressure and not smoking.
Taken from http://www.healthcastle.com/alcoholandcancer.shtml
How I Buy Alcohol
How I Buy Alcohol
Ans: Take bottle of alcohol, go to cashier, take out money and pay, leave the shop.
I am not a drinker (of alcohol). I never figured how people would actually find it palatable.
I buy duty free spirits using the following guidelines:
1. Will I be visiting someone who has given birth or been hospitalised soon?
a. Yes - Buy DOM
b. No - Go question 2.
2. Is there any liquor on sale?
a. Yes - If less than $50, buy that.
b. No - Go to question 3.
3. Is travelling partner in need of quota for liquor?
a. Yes - Buy what s/he needs and collect cash.
b. No - No need to buy liquor. Go to question 4.
4. Is there any wine on sale?
a. Yes - If less than $40, buy that.
b. No - Go to question 5.
5. Is travelling partner in need of quota for wine?
a. Yes - Buy what s/he needs and collect cash.
b. No - No need to buy wine. Go to question 6.
6. Is there any beer on sale?
a. Yes - Buy.
b. No - Go to question 7.
7. Is travelling partner in need of quota for beer?
a. Yes - Buy what s/he needs and collect cash.
b. No - No need to buy beer.
End.
Ans: Take bottle of alcohol, go to cashier, take out money and pay, leave the shop.
I am not a drinker (of alcohol). I never figured how people would actually find it palatable.
I buy duty free spirits using the following guidelines:
1. Will I be visiting someone who has given birth or been hospitalised soon?
a. Yes - Buy DOM
b. No - Go question 2.
2. Is there any liquor on sale?
a. Yes - If less than $50, buy that.
b. No - Go to question 3.
3. Is travelling partner in need of quota for liquor?
a. Yes - Buy what s/he needs and collect cash.
b. No - No need to buy liquor. Go to question 4.
4. Is there any wine on sale?
a. Yes - If less than $40, buy that.
b. No - Go to question 5.
5. Is travelling partner in need of quota for wine?
a. Yes - Buy what s/he needs and collect cash.
b. No - No need to buy wine. Go to question 6.
6. Is there any beer on sale?
a. Yes - Buy.
b. No - Go to question 7.
7. Is travelling partner in need of quota for beer?
a. Yes - Buy what s/he needs and collect cash.
b. No - No need to buy beer.
End.
Blue Liquor
Blue Liquor
Have a bottle of blue liquor at home.
Bought it on impulse because the blue looks nice. I mean, if there were a bath tub filled with water that colour, I'd gladly jump in for a soak.
Stuck with it since.
No one drinks.
Don't ask me - I don't know what it is, what brand it is, and how much it cost. I'm a R-OH dummy.
Have a bottle of blue liquor at home.
Bought it on impulse because the blue looks nice. I mean, if there were a bath tub filled with water that colour, I'd gladly jump in for a soak.
Stuck with it since.
No one drinks.
Don't ask me - I don't know what it is, what brand it is, and how much it cost. I'm a R-OH dummy.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Lactic Acid Is Not Muscles' Foe, It's Fuel
Lactic Acid Is Not Muscles' Foe, It's Fuel
By GINA KOLATA
The New York Times
Published: May 16, 2006
Everyone who has even thought about exercising has heard the warnings about lactic acid. It builds up in your muscles. It is what makes your muscles burn. Its buildup is what makes your muscles tire and give out.
Coaches and personal trainers tell athletes and exercisers that they have to learn to work out at just below their "lactic threshold," that point of diminishing returns when lactic acid starts to accumulate. Some athletes even have blood tests to find their personal lactic thresholds.
But that, it turns out, is all wrong. Lactic acid is actually a fuel, not a caustic waste product. Muscles make it deliberately, producing it from glucose, and they burn it to obtain energy. The reason trained athletes can perform so hard and so long is because their intense training causes their muscles to adapt so they more readily and efficiently absorb lactic acid.
The notion that lactic acid was bad took hold more than a century ago, said George A. Brooks, a professor in the department of integrative biology at the University of California, Berkeley. It stuck because it seemed to make so much sense.
"It's one of the classic mistakes in the history of science," Dr. Brooks said.
Its origins lie in a study by a Nobel laureate, Otto Meyerhof, who in the early years of the 20th century cut a frog in half and put its bottom half in a jar. The frog's muscles had no circulation — no source of oxygen or energy.
Dr. Myerhoff gave the frog's leg electric shocks to make the muscles contract, but after a few twitches, the muscles stopped moving. Then, when Dr. Myerhoff examined the muscles, he discovered that they were bathed in lactic acid.
A theory was born. Lack of oxygen to muscles leads to lactic acid, leads to fatigue.
Athletes were told that they should spend most of their effort exercising aerobically, using glucose as a fuel. If they tried to spend too much time exercising harder, in the anaerobic zone, they were told, they would pay a price, that lactic acid would accumulate in the muscles, forcing them to stop.
Few scientists questioned this view, Dr. Brooks said. But, he said, he became interested in it in the 1960's, when he was running track at Queens College and his coach told him that his performance was limited by a buildup of lactic acid.
When he graduated and began working on a Ph.D. in exercise physiology, he decided to study the lactic acid hypothesis for his dissertation.
"I gave rats radioactive lactic acid, and I found that they burned it faster than anything else I could give them," Dr. Brooks said.
It looked as if lactic acid was there for a reason. It was a source of energy.
Dr. Brooks said he published the finding in the late 70's. Other researchers challenged him at meetings and in print.
"I had huge fights, I had terrible trouble getting my grants funded, I had my papers rejected," Dr. Brooks recalled. But he soldiered on, conducting more elaborate studies with rats and, years later, moving on to humans. Every time, with every study, his results were consistent with his radical idea.
Eventually, other researchers confirmed the work. And gradually, the thinking among exercise physiologists began to change.
"The evidence has continued to mount," said L. Bruce Gladden, a professor of health and human performance at Auburn University. "It became clear that it is not so simple as to say, Lactic acid is a bad thing and it causes fatigue."
As for the idea that lactic acid causes muscle soreness, Dr. Gladden said, that never made sense.
"Lactic acid will be gone from your muscles within an hour of exercise," he said. "You get sore one to three days later. The time frame is not consistent, and the mechanisms have not been found."
The understanding now is that muscle cells convert glucose or glycogen to lactic acid. The lactic acid is taken up and used as a fuel by mitochondria, the energy factories in muscle cells.
Mitochondria even have a special transporter protein to move the substance into them, Dr. Brooks found. Intense training makes a difference, he said, because it can make double the mitochondrial mass.
It is clear that the old lactic acid theory cannot explain what is happening to muscles, Dr. Brooks and others said.
Yet, Dr. Brooks said, even though coaches often believed in the myth of the lactic acid threshold, they ended up training athletes in the best way possible to increase their mitochondria. "Coaches have understood things the scientists didn't," he said.
Through trial and error, coaches learned that athletic performance improved when athletes worked on endurance, running longer and longer distances, for example.
That, it turns out, increased the mass of their muscle mitochondria, letting them burn more lactic acid and allowing the muscles to work harder and longer.
Just before a race, coaches often tell athletes to train very hard in brief spurts.
That extra stress increases the mitochondria mass even more, Dr. Brooks said, and is the reason for improved performance.
And the scientists?
They took much longer to figure it out.
"They said, 'You're anaerobic, you need more oxygen,' " Dr. Brooks said. "The scientists were stuck in 1920."
By GINA KOLATA
The New York Times
Published: May 16, 2006
Everyone who has even thought about exercising has heard the warnings about lactic acid. It builds up in your muscles. It is what makes your muscles burn. Its buildup is what makes your muscles tire and give out.
Coaches and personal trainers tell athletes and exercisers that they have to learn to work out at just below their "lactic threshold," that point of diminishing returns when lactic acid starts to accumulate. Some athletes even have blood tests to find their personal lactic thresholds.
But that, it turns out, is all wrong. Lactic acid is actually a fuel, not a caustic waste product. Muscles make it deliberately, producing it from glucose, and they burn it to obtain energy. The reason trained athletes can perform so hard and so long is because their intense training causes their muscles to adapt so they more readily and efficiently absorb lactic acid.
The notion that lactic acid was bad took hold more than a century ago, said George A. Brooks, a professor in the department of integrative biology at the University of California, Berkeley. It stuck because it seemed to make so much sense.
"It's one of the classic mistakes in the history of science," Dr. Brooks said.
Its origins lie in a study by a Nobel laureate, Otto Meyerhof, who in the early years of the 20th century cut a frog in half and put its bottom half in a jar. The frog's muscles had no circulation — no source of oxygen or energy.
Dr. Myerhoff gave the frog's leg electric shocks to make the muscles contract, but after a few twitches, the muscles stopped moving. Then, when Dr. Myerhoff examined the muscles, he discovered that they were bathed in lactic acid.
A theory was born. Lack of oxygen to muscles leads to lactic acid, leads to fatigue.
Athletes were told that they should spend most of their effort exercising aerobically, using glucose as a fuel. If they tried to spend too much time exercising harder, in the anaerobic zone, they were told, they would pay a price, that lactic acid would accumulate in the muscles, forcing them to stop.
Few scientists questioned this view, Dr. Brooks said. But, he said, he became interested in it in the 1960's, when he was running track at Queens College and his coach told him that his performance was limited by a buildup of lactic acid.
When he graduated and began working on a Ph.D. in exercise physiology, he decided to study the lactic acid hypothesis for his dissertation.
"I gave rats radioactive lactic acid, and I found that they burned it faster than anything else I could give them," Dr. Brooks said.
It looked as if lactic acid was there for a reason. It was a source of energy.
Dr. Brooks said he published the finding in the late 70's. Other researchers challenged him at meetings and in print.
"I had huge fights, I had terrible trouble getting my grants funded, I had my papers rejected," Dr. Brooks recalled. But he soldiered on, conducting more elaborate studies with rats and, years later, moving on to humans. Every time, with every study, his results were consistent with his radical idea.
Eventually, other researchers confirmed the work. And gradually, the thinking among exercise physiologists began to change.
"The evidence has continued to mount," said L. Bruce Gladden, a professor of health and human performance at Auburn University. "It became clear that it is not so simple as to say, Lactic acid is a bad thing and it causes fatigue."
As for the idea that lactic acid causes muscle soreness, Dr. Gladden said, that never made sense.
"Lactic acid will be gone from your muscles within an hour of exercise," he said. "You get sore one to three days later. The time frame is not consistent, and the mechanisms have not been found."
The understanding now is that muscle cells convert glucose or glycogen to lactic acid. The lactic acid is taken up and used as a fuel by mitochondria, the energy factories in muscle cells.
Mitochondria even have a special transporter protein to move the substance into them, Dr. Brooks found. Intense training makes a difference, he said, because it can make double the mitochondrial mass.
It is clear that the old lactic acid theory cannot explain what is happening to muscles, Dr. Brooks and others said.
Yet, Dr. Brooks said, even though coaches often believed in the myth of the lactic acid threshold, they ended up training athletes in the best way possible to increase their mitochondria. "Coaches have understood things the scientists didn't," he said.
Through trial and error, coaches learned that athletic performance improved when athletes worked on endurance, running longer and longer distances, for example.
That, it turns out, increased the mass of their muscle mitochondria, letting them burn more lactic acid and allowing the muscles to work harder and longer.
Just before a race, coaches often tell athletes to train very hard in brief spurts.
That extra stress increases the mitochondria mass even more, Dr. Brooks said, and is the reason for improved performance.
And the scientists?
They took much longer to figure it out.
"They said, 'You're anaerobic, you need more oxygen,' " Dr. Brooks said. "The scientists were stuck in 1920."
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
Hippocratic Oath - Cake Baking Teacher Version
Hippocratic Oath - Cake Baking Teacher Version
I swear by cheesecake and carrot cake and all the gods and goddesses, making them my witnesses, that I will fulfil according to my ability and judgment this oath and this covenant:
To make and feed him cheesecake and carrot cake until he ingests the (name of subject) behind this art of cake eating and to drive non cakemaking (name of subject) teachers away from him, and if he is in need of formula to give him a bigger slice of cheesecake, and to regard his careless mistake as equal to a piece of mango cheesecake and to teach them (name of subject) - if they desire to learn it - without complaint and covenant; to give a share of carrot cake coated with lemon icing sugar and all the other rich goodies to them and to their sons of him who may have been equally inflicted with (subject skill) but have taken the correct path of being a student under a cakemaking (name of subject) teacher but no one else.
I will apply cup measures for the benefit of the lack of (subject skill) according to my ability and judgment; I will keep them from the kitchen and my Belling oven. I shall not use inferior ingredients beyond organic eggs and lovely lightly toasted walnuts and farm-fresh, pesticide free carrots although I am compelled by the powers that be that the cakes may not last for infinity.
I will neither give a cheesecake to anybody who asked for a carrot cake, nor will I make a suggestion to this effect. Similarly I will not give to a moron an carrot cake when he asked for cheesecake. I shall not make more ingredients that is already dictated by the recipe book or attempt to bake the cake faster by increasing the temperature of the oven. I shall resist from looking at measures of ounces and pounds so that absolutely no one mistake will slip through the metric system. In purity and holiness I will guard my life and my art.
I will not use the artificial flavourings, not even on uncarroty cakes, but will use more carrots in favor of such bakers as are engaged in this work. I will not use the blue cheese to make cheesecakes, when ordinary cream cheese will do.
Whatever classes I may visit, I will come for the benefit of the vaguely interested, remaining free of all intentional insults, of all mischief and in particular of assymetrical relations with both female and male persons, be they free or slaves. They will learn to eat cheesecake and learn. They will then learn to vary their tastes by eating carrot cakes and learn. They will finally learn to eat cheesecake and carrot cake and learn.
What I may see or hear in the course of the cake eating or even outside of the cake eating in regard to the inability to graduate from TAF club, which on no account one must spread abroad, I will keep to myself, holding such things shameful to be spoken about. I also swear not to divulge any instances of infidelity to the low fat, low sugar, low salt, and low calories rules.
If I fulfil this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy classes with extremely high motivation levels, and then being honored with fame among all men for all time to come when I am being remembered and thanked for my cakes during teachers' day celebrations; if I transgress it and swear falsely, I'll make more cheese and carrot cakes.
I swear by cheesecake and carrot cake and all the gods and goddesses, making them my witnesses, that I will fulfil according to my ability and judgment this oath and this covenant:
To make and feed him cheesecake and carrot cake until he ingests the (name of subject) behind this art of cake eating and to drive non cakemaking (name of subject) teachers away from him, and if he is in need of formula to give him a bigger slice of cheesecake, and to regard his careless mistake as equal to a piece of mango cheesecake and to teach them (name of subject) - if they desire to learn it - without complaint and covenant; to give a share of carrot cake coated with lemon icing sugar and all the other rich goodies to them and to their sons of him who may have been equally inflicted with (subject skill) but have taken the correct path of being a student under a cakemaking (name of subject) teacher but no one else.
I will apply cup measures for the benefit of the lack of (subject skill) according to my ability and judgment; I will keep them from the kitchen and my Belling oven. I shall not use inferior ingredients beyond organic eggs and lovely lightly toasted walnuts and farm-fresh, pesticide free carrots although I am compelled by the powers that be that the cakes may not last for infinity.
I will neither give a cheesecake to anybody who asked for a carrot cake, nor will I make a suggestion to this effect. Similarly I will not give to a moron an carrot cake when he asked for cheesecake. I shall not make more ingredients that is already dictated by the recipe book or attempt to bake the cake faster by increasing the temperature of the oven. I shall resist from looking at measures of ounces and pounds so that absolutely no one mistake will slip through the metric system. In purity and holiness I will guard my life and my art.
I will not use the artificial flavourings, not even on uncarroty cakes, but will use more carrots in favor of such bakers as are engaged in this work. I will not use the blue cheese to make cheesecakes, when ordinary cream cheese will do.
Whatever classes I may visit, I will come for the benefit of the vaguely interested, remaining free of all intentional insults, of all mischief and in particular of assymetrical relations with both female and male persons, be they free or slaves. They will learn to eat cheesecake and learn. They will then learn to vary their tastes by eating carrot cakes and learn. They will finally learn to eat cheesecake and carrot cake and learn.
What I may see or hear in the course of the cake eating or even outside of the cake eating in regard to the inability to graduate from TAF club, which on no account one must spread abroad, I will keep to myself, holding such things shameful to be spoken about. I also swear not to divulge any instances of infidelity to the low fat, low sugar, low salt, and low calories rules.
If I fulfil this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy classes with extremely high motivation levels, and then being honored with fame among all men for all time to come when I am being remembered and thanked for my cakes during teachers' day celebrations; if I transgress it and swear falsely, I'll make more cheese and carrot cakes.
Monday, May 15, 2006
Hippocratic Oath - High School Math Teacher Version
Hippocratic Oath - High School Math Teacher Version
I swear by Archimedes, Euclid, Eratosthenes, Pythagoras, Diophantine, Gauss, Newton, Descartes, de Fermat, Mersenne, Bernoulli, Euler, Galois and all the gods and goddesses (and Google too for helping me with those elusive names), making them my witnesses, that I will fulfill according to my ability and judgment this oath and this covenant:
To hold him until he is taught this art of Algebra and to drive Algeblur away from him, and if he is in need of formula to give him a copy of the formula booklet, and to regard his careless mistake as equal to the end of the world and to teach them mathematics - if they desire to learn it - without complaint and covenant; to give a share of practice questions and mock examination papers and all the other learning to them and to their sons of him who may have been equally inflicted with innumeracy but have taken the path of compulsory education in accordance to the mathematical law, but no one else.
I will apply exponential measures for the benefit of the innumerate according to my ability and judgment; I will keep them from complex numbers and hyperbolic functions. I shall not test beyond triangles and the Pythagoras' theorem, trigonometric functions and the sine and cosine laws although I am compelled by the powers that be that the triangles may not exist singly.
I will neither give a deadly Math test to anybody who asked for it, nor will I make a suggestion to this effect. Similarly I will not give to a moron an easy way out. I shall not make more difficult any question that is already almost insolvable given their little brains or more easy any question that is already almost insolvable given their genius. I shall resist from looking at measures of central tendency, histograms or cumulative frequency graphs so that absolutely no one will achieve a distinction without the required number of marks. In purity and holiness I will guard my life and my art.
I will not use the mathematical tables, not even on sufferers from stone, but will use calculators in favor of such men as are engaged in this work. I will not use the protractor to construct special angles, when a compass and a straightedge will do.
Whatever classes I may visit, I will come for the benefit of the vaguely interested, remaining free of all intentional insults, of all mischief and in particular of asymmetrical relations with both female and male persons, be they free or slaves. They will learn to reflect, enlarge, stretch and shear their imaginations and mathematical ability. They will learn to vary their quantities in proportionate amounts dictated by simultaneous equations. They will learn to graph their findings and plot their points accurately on the graphing paper provided, respecting the scales used on each axis.
What I may see or hear in the course of the teaching or even outside of the teaching in regard to the inability to differentiate or integrate, which on no account one must spread abroad, I will keep to myself, holding such things shameful to be spoken about. I also swear not to divulge any instances of infidelity to the chain, product, and quotient rules.
If I fulfill this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy classes with extremely high failure rates in school examinations, and then being honored with fame among all men for all time to come when the national examination results are released; if I transgress it and swear falsely, who the f*ck cares.
I swear by Archimedes, Euclid, Eratosthenes, Pythagoras, Diophantine, Gauss, Newton, Descartes, de Fermat, Mersenne, Bernoulli, Euler, Galois and all the gods and goddesses (and Google too for helping me with those elusive names), making them my witnesses, that I will fulfill according to my ability and judgment this oath and this covenant:
To hold him until he is taught this art of Algebra and to drive Algeblur away from him, and if he is in need of formula to give him a copy of the formula booklet, and to regard his careless mistake as equal to the end of the world and to teach them mathematics - if they desire to learn it - without complaint and covenant; to give a share of practice questions and mock examination papers and all the other learning to them and to their sons of him who may have been equally inflicted with innumeracy but have taken the path of compulsory education in accordance to the mathematical law, but no one else.
I will apply exponential measures for the benefit of the innumerate according to my ability and judgment; I will keep them from complex numbers and hyperbolic functions. I shall not test beyond triangles and the Pythagoras' theorem, trigonometric functions and the sine and cosine laws although I am compelled by the powers that be that the triangles may not exist singly.
I will neither give a deadly Math test to anybody who asked for it, nor will I make a suggestion to this effect. Similarly I will not give to a moron an easy way out. I shall not make more difficult any question that is already almost insolvable given their little brains or more easy any question that is already almost insolvable given their genius. I shall resist from looking at measures of central tendency, histograms or cumulative frequency graphs so that absolutely no one will achieve a distinction without the required number of marks. In purity and holiness I will guard my life and my art.
I will not use the mathematical tables, not even on sufferers from stone, but will use calculators in favor of such men as are engaged in this work. I will not use the protractor to construct special angles, when a compass and a straightedge will do.
Whatever classes I may visit, I will come for the benefit of the vaguely interested, remaining free of all intentional insults, of all mischief and in particular of asymmetrical relations with both female and male persons, be they free or slaves. They will learn to reflect, enlarge, stretch and shear their imaginations and mathematical ability. They will learn to vary their quantities in proportionate amounts dictated by simultaneous equations. They will learn to graph their findings and plot their points accurately on the graphing paper provided, respecting the scales used on each axis.
What I may see or hear in the course of the teaching or even outside of the teaching in regard to the inability to differentiate or integrate, which on no account one must spread abroad, I will keep to myself, holding such things shameful to be spoken about. I also swear not to divulge any instances of infidelity to the chain, product, and quotient rules.
If I fulfill this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy classes with extremely high failure rates in school examinations, and then being honored with fame among all men for all time to come when the national examination results are released; if I transgress it and swear falsely, who the f*ck cares.
Hippocratic Oath -- Classical Version
Hippocratic Oath -- Classical Version
I swear by Apollo Physician and Asclepius and Hygieia and Panaceia and all the gods and goddesses, making them my witnesses, that I will fulfil according to my ability and judgment this oath and this covenant:
To hold him who has taught me this art as equal to my parents and to live my life in partnership with him, and if he is in need of money to give him a share of mine, and to regard his offspring as equal to my brothers in male lineage and to teach them this art - if they desire to learn it - without fee and covenant; to give a share of precepts and oral instruction and all the other learning to my sons and to the sons of him who has instructed me and to pupils who have signed the covenant and have taken an oath according to the medical law, but no one else.
I will apply dietetic measures for the benefit of the sick according to my ability and judgment; I will keep them from harm and injustice.
I will neither give a deadly drug to anybody who asked for it, nor will I make a suggestion to this effect. Similarly I will not give to a woman an abortive remedy. In purity and holiness I will guard my life and my art.
I will not use the knife, not even on sufferers from stone, but will withdraw in favor of such men as are engaged in this work.
Whatever houses I may visit, I will come for the benefit of the sick, remaining free of all intentional injustice, of all mischief and in particular of sexual relations with both female and male persons, be they free or slaves.
What I may see or hear in the course of the treatment or even outside of the treatment in regard to the life of men, which on no account one must spread abroad, I will keep to myself, holding such things shameful to be spoken about.
If I fulfil this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy life and art, being honored with fame among all men for all time to come; if I transgress it and swear falsely, may the opposite of all this be my lot.
Translation from the Greek by Ludwig Edelstein. From The Hippocratic Oath: Text, Translation, and Interpretation, by Ludwig Edelstein. Baltimore: Johns Hopkins Press, 1943.
I swear by Apollo Physician and Asclepius and Hygieia and Panaceia and all the gods and goddesses, making them my witnesses, that I will fulfil according to my ability and judgment this oath and this covenant:
To hold him who has taught me this art as equal to my parents and to live my life in partnership with him, and if he is in need of money to give him a share of mine, and to regard his offspring as equal to my brothers in male lineage and to teach them this art - if they desire to learn it - without fee and covenant; to give a share of precepts and oral instruction and all the other learning to my sons and to the sons of him who has instructed me and to pupils who have signed the covenant and have taken an oath according to the medical law, but no one else.
I will apply dietetic measures for the benefit of the sick according to my ability and judgment; I will keep them from harm and injustice.
I will neither give a deadly drug to anybody who asked for it, nor will I make a suggestion to this effect. Similarly I will not give to a woman an abortive remedy. In purity and holiness I will guard my life and my art.
I will not use the knife, not even on sufferers from stone, but will withdraw in favor of such men as are engaged in this work.
Whatever houses I may visit, I will come for the benefit of the sick, remaining free of all intentional injustice, of all mischief and in particular of sexual relations with both female and male persons, be they free or slaves.
What I may see or hear in the course of the treatment or even outside of the treatment in regard to the life of men, which on no account one must spread abroad, I will keep to myself, holding such things shameful to be spoken about.
If I fulfil this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy life and art, being honored with fame among all men for all time to come; if I transgress it and swear falsely, may the opposite of all this be my lot.
Translation from the Greek by Ludwig Edelstein. From The Hippocratic Oath: Text, Translation, and Interpretation, by Ludwig Edelstein. Baltimore: Johns Hopkins Press, 1943.
Hippocratic Oath -- Modern Version
Hippocratic Oath -- Modern Version
Upon graduation, many medical students take a modern version of the oath written by Louis Lasagna in 1964.
I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this covenant:
I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow.
I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures [that] are required, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.
I will remember that there is art to medicine as well as science, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon's knife or the chemist's drug.
I will not be ashamed to say "I know not," nor will I fail to call in my colleagues when the skills of another are needed for a patient's recovery.
I will respect the privacy of my patients, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty. Above all, I must not play at God.
I will remember that I do not treat a fever chart, a cancerous growth, but a sick human being, whose illness may affect the person's family and economic stability. My responsibility includes these related problems, if I am to care adequately for the sick.
I will prevent disease whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure.
I will remember that I remain a member of society, with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those sound of mind and body as well as the infirm.
If I do not violate this oath, may I enjoy life and art, respected while I live and remembered with affection thereafter. May I always act so as to preserve the finest traditions of my calling and may I long experience the joy of healing those who seek my help.
Written in 1964 by Louis Lasagna, Academic Dean of the School of Medicine at Tufts University, and used in many medical schools today.
Upon graduation, many medical students take a modern version of the oath written by Louis Lasagna in 1964.
I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this covenant:
I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow.
I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures [that] are required, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.
I will remember that there is art to medicine as well as science, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon's knife or the chemist's drug.
I will not be ashamed to say "I know not," nor will I fail to call in my colleagues when the skills of another are needed for a patient's recovery.
I will respect the privacy of my patients, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty. Above all, I must not play at God.
I will remember that I do not treat a fever chart, a cancerous growth, but a sick human being, whose illness may affect the person's family and economic stability. My responsibility includes these related problems, if I am to care adequately for the sick.
I will prevent disease whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure.
I will remember that I remain a member of society, with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those sound of mind and body as well as the infirm.
If I do not violate this oath, may I enjoy life and art, respected while I live and remembered with affection thereafter. May I always act so as to preserve the finest traditions of my calling and may I long experience the joy of healing those who seek my help.
Written in 1964 by Louis Lasagna, Academic Dean of the School of Medicine at Tufts University, and used in many medical schools today.
Saturday, May 13, 2006
Fish Feeding at the Botanic Gardens
Fish Feeding at the Botanic Gardens
Went to feed the fish at the Botanic Gardens today. This was the third time in two weeks. First feeding was 6 May, second was 12 May (yesterday), and today I went again.
Nothing more therapeutic than feeding fish and watching them swim by and lap up the pieces of bread.
Love it!
Went to feed the fish at the Botanic Gardens today. This was the third time in two weeks. First feeding was 6 May, second was 12 May (yesterday), and today I went again.
Nothing more therapeutic than feeding fish and watching them swim by and lap up the pieces of bread.
Love it!
Sun Lok Restaurant
Sun Lok Restaurant at Taman Jurong
Nothing like Tung Lok. In fact, not as great as some of the hawker food stalls.
Here's the scoop.
Service
Generally slow. Maybe the motivation isn't there as the outlet was giving a 10% discount for its opening promotion. But still, this is no excuse.
Food
We weren't hungry, especially after having had some vegetarian food at Bo Tien Temple before going there. One thing to note: If food tastes good when you are half-full, the food will taste really good. Otherwise, forgettable. Which was what happened at Sun Lok.
Wantan Noodles - stringy, hard noodles without sufficient sauce to cover the noodles. Old stringy chye sim (mustard greens) and wantons which leave their skirts stuck to the plate when their breasts are picked up. Salty wanton filling, thinly veiled attempt to blend in the flat fish meant to flavour the prawns - the flat fish ended up causing the wantons to taste very sandy.
Har kow (prawn dumplings) - one of the typical dishes to grade any tim sum outlet. The skin was good, chewing, translucent and doesn't stick to the teeth or hard palatte, but the filling needs work.
Siew mai (meat dumplings) - the second definitive dish. The mushroom was not sufficiently drained of its soaking liquids, causing an extremely woody watery taste to the siew mais.
Fried carrot cake - bits of bacon and strips of radishes are found within the pieces served. Reasonably soft and savoury, but the pieces became crumbly when cold. Someone needs to teach them to use better gelling flour. And unfortunately, when I asked for black sweet sauce which typically goes with this dish, I was told they were out of it. Hello, Sheng Siong the sell-all supermarket is JUST next door. Is it too much to run over and buy?
Fried vegetarian spring rolls - run-of-the-mill. I've had better.
Char siew bao (meat buns) - good skin let down by poor filling again. Why is it that these people don't understand that a bit of sesame seeds in the filling makes it wonderful tasting? Pure meat and sweet sauce do nothing for me.
Condiments
New category. Well, some deserve special mention, others need special condemnation. Here, the vinegared green chillis were badly cut and overly sour. The red shrimp chilli paste was too salty.
Drinks
The Chinese tea came in a humongous cup and was hard to drink from as it was too hot. The soya bean drink my friend had must have been just ok, since he was quiet throughout.
Overall grades
Service C
Food C
Condiments D
Drinks C
Ambience D (Screaming kids and tim sum places don't go together)
Price D (Well, you cannot expect to charge Crystal Jade prices when you are just a wannabe)
Nothing like Tung Lok. In fact, not as great as some of the hawker food stalls.
Here's the scoop.
Service
Generally slow. Maybe the motivation isn't there as the outlet was giving a 10% discount for its opening promotion. But still, this is no excuse.
Food
We weren't hungry, especially after having had some vegetarian food at Bo Tien Temple before going there. One thing to note: If food tastes good when you are half-full, the food will taste really good. Otherwise, forgettable. Which was what happened at Sun Lok.
Wantan Noodles - stringy, hard noodles without sufficient sauce to cover the noodles. Old stringy chye sim (mustard greens) and wantons which leave their skirts stuck to the plate when their breasts are picked up. Salty wanton filling, thinly veiled attempt to blend in the flat fish meant to flavour the prawns - the flat fish ended up causing the wantons to taste very sandy.
Har kow (prawn dumplings) - one of the typical dishes to grade any tim sum outlet. The skin was good, chewing, translucent and doesn't stick to the teeth or hard palatte, but the filling needs work.
Siew mai (meat dumplings) - the second definitive dish. The mushroom was not sufficiently drained of its soaking liquids, causing an extremely woody watery taste to the siew mais.
Fried carrot cake - bits of bacon and strips of radishes are found within the pieces served. Reasonably soft and savoury, but the pieces became crumbly when cold. Someone needs to teach them to use better gelling flour. And unfortunately, when I asked for black sweet sauce which typically goes with this dish, I was told they were out of it. Hello, Sheng Siong the sell-all supermarket is JUST next door. Is it too much to run over and buy?
Fried vegetarian spring rolls - run-of-the-mill. I've had better.
Char siew bao (meat buns) - good skin let down by poor filling again. Why is it that these people don't understand that a bit of sesame seeds in the filling makes it wonderful tasting? Pure meat and sweet sauce do nothing for me.
Condiments
New category. Well, some deserve special mention, others need special condemnation. Here, the vinegared green chillis were badly cut and overly sour. The red shrimp chilli paste was too salty.
Drinks
The Chinese tea came in a humongous cup and was hard to drink from as it was too hot. The soya bean drink my friend had must have been just ok, since he was quiet throughout.
Overall grades
Service C
Food C
Condiments D
Drinks C
Ambience D (Screaming kids and tim sum places don't go together)
Price D (Well, you cannot expect to charge Crystal Jade prices when you are just a wannabe)
Friday, May 12, 2006
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Exchange with Telemarketer
Exchange with Telemarketer
TM: Hello Mr Tan, we have a special promotion for XYZ bank credit card holders.
Me: What?
TM: Oh, we are having a special rate of 3.25% for funds transfer.
Me: Where got money?
TM: Surely you have the money? You know, it's a special rate. Credit cards is 24%.
Me: It's not interest you are paying me; you are charging me interest. You are getting me into debt and to encourage me to do so, you lower the loan interest. What kind of special promotion is that?
TM: But the rate is lower...
Me: And the interest doesn't come to me.
TM: If you transfer $5000 now, we'll give you a watch.
Me: Really? What watch?
TM: Oh, ABC watch.
Me: Orh, ABC only ah? $50 can buy already. I thought Rolex...
TM: Aiyoh, you so funny... If Rolex, I open account already...
Me: Then you wait until Rolex, then you call me again lah. $5000, I now $500 also dunno where to find.
TM: No problem lah... Thank you Mr Tan.
Me: You're welcome. Have a nice evening.
TM: Thank you.
Amazed?
TM: Hello Mr Tan, we have a special promotion for XYZ bank credit card holders.
Me: What?
TM: Oh, we are having a special rate of 3.25% for funds transfer.
Me: Where got money?
TM: Surely you have the money? You know, it's a special rate. Credit cards is 24%.
Me: It's not interest you are paying me; you are charging me interest. You are getting me into debt and to encourage me to do so, you lower the loan interest. What kind of special promotion is that?
TM: But the rate is lower...
Me: And the interest doesn't come to me.
TM: If you transfer $5000 now, we'll give you a watch.
Me: Really? What watch?
TM: Oh, ABC watch.
Me: Orh, ABC only ah? $50 can buy already. I thought Rolex...
TM: Aiyoh, you so funny... If Rolex, I open account already...
Me: Then you wait until Rolex, then you call me again lah. $5000, I now $500 also dunno where to find.
TM: No problem lah... Thank you Mr Tan.
Me: You're welcome. Have a nice evening.
TM: Thank you.
Amazed?
On the Radio Today
On the Radio Today
Heard on Class 95 FM News Flash
Question: Why do chickens lay eggs?
Answer: If they drop them, they will break.
-_-|||
Heard on Class 95 FM News Flash
Question: Why do chickens lay eggs?
Answer: If they drop them, they will break.
-_-|||
Monday, May 08, 2006
Again? *Blink blink*
Again? *Blink blink*
Saw on a Singapore expatriate classified ads site.
Wed Apr 26, 2006
miracle heir oil
Hm... What do you think it is selling?
Saw on a Singapore expatriate classified ads site.
Wed Apr 26, 2006
miracle heir oil
Hm... What do you think it is selling?
Saturday, May 06, 2006
High Wood
High Wood
Went to High Wood for lunch. More of a snack lunch, after feeding the fish at the Botanic Gardens.
The restaurant is housed in the ex-Singapore Flying Club near Tanglin.
Food - Overall D
Chicken Wings - F
Covered with way too much batter
Calamari Rings - D
Covered with too much batter
Mussels baked in Cheese - C
Mussels are too chewy, the cheese is overbaked. Too dry, not juicy. (The portion was supposed to be 12 but only 10 mussels were served. Had I not been alert...)
German (pork) Sausages - C
Supposed to be 7 sausages but they cut them up to slightly brown the sides as well. I doubt there were really 7.
Cafe Latte - C
Ordinary.
Orange Juice - D
Too sweet, too much artificial looking sacs parading as pulp
Service - no service charge, not much service, no grade.
Ambience - D
Fell way short of expectations
The lunch was dismal enough that we wanted to leave. Asked for the sausages and the calamari rings to be packed. When we took out the takeaways later, we realised only 7 pieces of sausages were in the plastic container. We certainly thought we had packed more than that. Maybe the sausages dropped out of the teeny weeny air vents in the container and the plastic bag ate it. But we checked plastic bag's stomach and intestines. No sign of ingestion by the trusty plastic bag.
Erm...
Another struck off the list.
Went to High Wood for lunch. More of a snack lunch, after feeding the fish at the Botanic Gardens.
The restaurant is housed in the ex-Singapore Flying Club near Tanglin.
Food - Overall D
Chicken Wings - F
Covered with way too much batter
Calamari Rings - D
Covered with too much batter
Mussels baked in Cheese - C
Mussels are too chewy, the cheese is overbaked. Too dry, not juicy. (The portion was supposed to be 12 but only 10 mussels were served. Had I not been alert...)
German (pork) Sausages - C
Supposed to be 7 sausages but they cut them up to slightly brown the sides as well. I doubt there were really 7.
Cafe Latte - C
Ordinary.
Orange Juice - D
Too sweet, too much artificial looking sacs parading as pulp
Service - no service charge, not much service, no grade.
Ambience - D
Fell way short of expectations
The lunch was dismal enough that we wanted to leave. Asked for the sausages and the calamari rings to be packed. When we took out the takeaways later, we realised only 7 pieces of sausages were in the plastic container. We certainly thought we had packed more than that. Maybe the sausages dropped out of the teeny weeny air vents in the container and the plastic bag ate it. But we checked plastic bag's stomach and intestines. No sign of ingestion by the trusty plastic bag.
Erm...
Another struck off the list.
Size does not matter
Size does not matter
Regardless of Singapore's size, we MUST allow people who vote opposition live under opposition rule.
The voting game is never about voting the opposition to teach the ruling party a lesson.
Because voting opposition means you prefer to live under opposition rule. Otherwise, you can always put in a spoilt vote. How to do it is for you to find out, for me to know.
Opposition candidates are also extremely irresponsible to call for the electorate to vote opposition to tell the PAP that they are not doing enough. If they so desire, then do what Sitoh Yi Pin and Eric Low are doing in the past in Potong Pasir and Hougang respective - provide aid, however limited.
Why appear once a while and start prescribing what people must do or what the government must do?
We have the Speakers' Corner, we have the forum pages, we have feedback channels. All our political office bearers' emails are announced in the government directory.
Why are these people, even if not elected, not submitting proposals for the government to consider if they really feel that much for the populace?
Yet, normal, non-affliated person on the street tries to bring up issues and convince the government to consider changes. Haven't JC students done so at the various seminars, workshops and fora?
Why haven't the opposition?
Regardless of Singapore's size, we MUST allow people who vote opposition live under opposition rule.
The voting game is never about voting the opposition to teach the ruling party a lesson.
Because voting opposition means you prefer to live under opposition rule. Otherwise, you can always put in a spoilt vote. How to do it is for you to find out, for me to know.
Opposition candidates are also extremely irresponsible to call for the electorate to vote opposition to tell the PAP that they are not doing enough. If they so desire, then do what Sitoh Yi Pin and Eric Low are doing in the past in Potong Pasir and Hougang respective - provide aid, however limited.
Why appear once a while and start prescribing what people must do or what the government must do?
We have the Speakers' Corner, we have the forum pages, we have feedback channels. All our political office bearers' emails are announced in the government directory.
Why are these people, even if not elected, not submitting proposals for the government to consider if they really feel that much for the populace?
Yet, normal, non-affliated person on the street tries to bring up issues and convince the government to consider changes. Haven't JC students done so at the various seminars, workshops and fora?
Why haven't the opposition?
Friday, May 05, 2006
Stinky Fish at Delhi Restaurant
Stinky Fish at Delhi Restaurant
Ate at Delhi Restaurant for lunch.
Ordered some typical Indian and Khasmiri dishes.
Some were ok, there were at least 2 misses, or 3.
The watery mutton curry was way over salted.
The garlic naan was so hard my teeth could break.
Worst of all, the fish in the fish masala was so stale that the stink of stale fish even permeated the heavily spiced curry gravy.
But the party of 4 friends I was with was extremely forgiving. Well, with them, I forgive a lot too.
Even when I told the restaurant of the unacceptably bad fish, they billed us for the fish.
Disappointing. First time I'm there, and probably the last time too.
Ate at Delhi Restaurant for lunch.
Ordered some typical Indian and Khasmiri dishes.
Some were ok, there were at least 2 misses, or 3.
The watery mutton curry was way over salted.
The garlic naan was so hard my teeth could break.
Worst of all, the fish in the fish masala was so stale that the stink of stale fish even permeated the heavily spiced curry gravy.
But the party of 4 friends I was with was extremely forgiving. Well, with them, I forgive a lot too.
Even when I told the restaurant of the unacceptably bad fish, they billed us for the fish.
Disappointing. First time I'm there, and probably the last time too.
Leeches
Leeches
That's what they are.
They want to be elected as members of parliaments to tell the ruling party what to do.
Huh?! Why do I need to get people in, pay them lots of money for them to TELL the ruling party what to do instead of THEY doing it THEMSELVES?
Something new.
That's what they are.
They want to be elected as members of parliaments to tell the ruling party what to do.
Huh?! Why do I need to get people in, pay them lots of money for them to TELL the ruling party what to do instead of THEY doing it THEMSELVES?
Something new.
My Wish List For Singapore
My Wish List For Singapore
I dream one day the ruling party could consider doing this. Carve out Singapore to a PAP zone, a SDA zone, a SDP zone, a WP zone... This will be carved in accordance to the percentage of total votes won by each political party.
Then whoever votes for the relevant party will stay in that zone for the entire period of government, until the next round of elections come along.
Each zone can be thought of as a mini country, each with its own government and policy. With its own defence, police, hospitals, schools, and government facilities. Each will eke out its living by attracting their own investments, set up their own transport system.
That means, the current hospitals run by MOH will not be open to non-PAP people. They can come over and when that happens, they will pay foreigner rates. MOE will not be providing subsidized schooling for the non-PAP supporters etc etc.
PAP zone can be upgraded when PAP has the money. So can the other zones. Each zone will be provided for by the separate political party running the zone. If they want, they can admit opposition members from other zones into their government. Except I want my PAP zone to be run only by the PAP, with at most 3 non-constituency members of parliaments, and non-members of parliament to provide alternative voices.
We have entirely separate mechanisms under the same country.
That would satisfy everyone's desire of having opposition in Singapore. Opposition supporters want an alternative lifestyle that I don't. They can live in the zone they ask for.
I want my creature comforts, high taxes, proper education, subsidized healthcare, booming airport, busy ports, lack of freedom... I am prepared to give up certain things for such a lifestyle.
People who prefer otherwise should move away. They should live in the zone that their heart desires.
Change of mind is possible, except that they can only do so at the next election.
This way, opposition MPs earn their own keep (instead of relying on my taxes for their MP allowances). They keep their own promises to the people who support them.
People who want alternative voices should be prepared to sacrifice upgrading. They should be prepared to give up their subsidized education, subsidized healthcare and so on and receive what the political party they support offer to them with open hands. They should look forward to free estate upgrading, free lift installations which stop on every floor, jobs for them (and not foreign talents), free education etc etc.
Perhaps this would be the perfect solution for all those who yearn so much for an alternative lifestyle in Singapore.
Me? I'm glad to be "an oppressed and a yes-man" living in relative comfort and luxury.
I dream one day the ruling party could consider doing this. Carve out Singapore to a PAP zone, a SDA zone, a SDP zone, a WP zone... This will be carved in accordance to the percentage of total votes won by each political party.
Then whoever votes for the relevant party will stay in that zone for the entire period of government, until the next round of elections come along.
Each zone can be thought of as a mini country, each with its own government and policy. With its own defence, police, hospitals, schools, and government facilities. Each will eke out its living by attracting their own investments, set up their own transport system.
That means, the current hospitals run by MOH will not be open to non-PAP people. They can come over and when that happens, they will pay foreigner rates. MOE will not be providing subsidized schooling for the non-PAP supporters etc etc.
PAP zone can be upgraded when PAP has the money. So can the other zones. Each zone will be provided for by the separate political party running the zone. If they want, they can admit opposition members from other zones into their government. Except I want my PAP zone to be run only by the PAP, with at most 3 non-constituency members of parliaments, and non-members of parliament to provide alternative voices.
We have entirely separate mechanisms under the same country.
That would satisfy everyone's desire of having opposition in Singapore. Opposition supporters want an alternative lifestyle that I don't. They can live in the zone they ask for.
I want my creature comforts, high taxes, proper education, subsidized healthcare, booming airport, busy ports, lack of freedom... I am prepared to give up certain things for such a lifestyle.
People who prefer otherwise should move away. They should live in the zone that their heart desires.
Change of mind is possible, except that they can only do so at the next election.
This way, opposition MPs earn their own keep (instead of relying on my taxes for their MP allowances). They keep their own promises to the people who support them.
People who want alternative voices should be prepared to sacrifice upgrading. They should be prepared to give up their subsidized education, subsidized healthcare and so on and receive what the political party they support offer to them with open hands. They should look forward to free estate upgrading, free lift installations which stop on every floor, jobs for them (and not foreign talents), free education etc etc.
Perhaps this would be the perfect solution for all those who yearn so much for an alternative lifestyle in Singapore.
Me? I'm glad to be "an oppressed and a yes-man" living in relative comfort and luxury.
Monday, May 01, 2006
What you don't know won't cost you
What You Don't Know Won't Cost You
At a gathering one evening, I was engaged in conversation with a financial planner.
He told me that in Singapore, only full-paying healthcare is decent.
He gave the example of someone who has some critical condition, and only when you go to a wallet slimming private hospital that the person can be saved. Or this person can seek help at a government hospital and stay in the unsubsidised classes.
Curious, I asked him why the comment.
He said, in subsidised wards (in government hospitals), you get lousy doctors.
Interesting but flawed logic.
Government hospitals are also training hospitals. Young doctors train there and they are supervised by their professors or seniors.
When a subsidised patient enters the hospital, s/he is alloted to a senior doctor's team and the doctor and his/her trainees will come by and look after the patient.
When a fully paying patient enters, the senior doctor does all the work usually. And when the senior doctor is not around? The trainees come in nonetheless.
Even in the private hospital, you'll get teams of doctors.
So, as long as the supervising doctor does his job well, the patient is fine.
Having made this point, Financial Planner said, but you cannot choose the supervising doctor if you are a subsidised patient. If you are a private patient, you can choose who you want.
Oh, the money and the ego at work here.
I'm one person who doesn't know any top doctors because I'm just a church mouse.
I won't know who is good and who is bad. All I know is that if the doctor has poor bedside manners, then no amount of skills will make up for his lack of EQ.
Anyway, who are we to decide one doctor is better than another? They've all taken the Hippocratic (thanks for checking spelling, OKE) Oath.
Research also shows that a patient's healing process is 50% or more dependent on his faith in the doctor. As long as you have faith in the doctor assigned, you're likely to be fine anyway.
It's only people with a few more wads of stinky money that would actually do such snobbish things like compare and run down doctors. I'm convinced then that whoever ends up paying a bomb for medical care owing to flawed decisions DESERVED IT fully.
I never chose any doctors. The last time I stayed in the hospital, I was serving national service and I was cheapskately getting a cosmetic job (anal skin tag removal) at the army's expense.
I never chose a doctor. Didn't even know that my doctor, a Dr Tsang, was one of the best in his field. I only found out much later. He's one friendly, arrogant doctor. I know it's contradicting, but on him, it was fine.
So I went under and he knew I was a subsidised case. No question about that. And because my case was pretty simple and I had been a good patient (I fasted and cleaned out without complaint), he let me go first.
Instead of doing what he was asked to do, he looked in and ligated whatever internal piles he saw in the anus as a bonus.
He didn't even charge for that. It was the same fees whether I removed the little piece of flesh or for the additional he removed, for my comfort.
Choose a doctor? Whatever for?
I believe that doctors are benevolent in general.
I went back for a few reviews after my surgery and all the while, I was never made to feel like a subsidised patient. Dr Tsang was most professional throughout and I never thought I'd want to get anyone else.
Believe me. Usually, patient attitude counts a lot too. If you degrade or doubt your doctor, then he or she can't do much for you either.
It's a tacit trust in caregiving that makes it all so healing and wonderful.
I'll never argue with my cash by asking for full paying status!
At a gathering one evening, I was engaged in conversation with a financial planner.
He told me that in Singapore, only full-paying healthcare is decent.
He gave the example of someone who has some critical condition, and only when you go to a wallet slimming private hospital that the person can be saved. Or this person can seek help at a government hospital and stay in the unsubsidised classes.
Curious, I asked him why the comment.
He said, in subsidised wards (in government hospitals), you get lousy doctors.
Interesting but flawed logic.
Government hospitals are also training hospitals. Young doctors train there and they are supervised by their professors or seniors.
When a subsidised patient enters the hospital, s/he is alloted to a senior doctor's team and the doctor and his/her trainees will come by and look after the patient.
When a fully paying patient enters, the senior doctor does all the work usually. And when the senior doctor is not around? The trainees come in nonetheless.
Even in the private hospital, you'll get teams of doctors.
So, as long as the supervising doctor does his job well, the patient is fine.
Having made this point, Financial Planner said, but you cannot choose the supervising doctor if you are a subsidised patient. If you are a private patient, you can choose who you want.
Oh, the money and the ego at work here.
I'm one person who doesn't know any top doctors because I'm just a church mouse.
I won't know who is good and who is bad. All I know is that if the doctor has poor bedside manners, then no amount of skills will make up for his lack of EQ.
Anyway, who are we to decide one doctor is better than another? They've all taken the Hippocratic (thanks for checking spelling, OKE) Oath.
Research also shows that a patient's healing process is 50% or more dependent on his faith in the doctor. As long as you have faith in the doctor assigned, you're likely to be fine anyway.
It's only people with a few more wads of stinky money that would actually do such snobbish things like compare and run down doctors. I'm convinced then that whoever ends up paying a bomb for medical care owing to flawed decisions DESERVED IT fully.
I never chose any doctors. The last time I stayed in the hospital, I was serving national service and I was cheapskately getting a cosmetic job (anal skin tag removal) at the army's expense.
I never chose a doctor. Didn't even know that my doctor, a Dr Tsang, was one of the best in his field. I only found out much later. He's one friendly, arrogant doctor. I know it's contradicting, but on him, it was fine.
So I went under and he knew I was a subsidised case. No question about that. And because my case was pretty simple and I had been a good patient (I fasted and cleaned out without complaint), he let me go first.
Instead of doing what he was asked to do, he looked in and ligated whatever internal piles he saw in the anus as a bonus.
He didn't even charge for that. It was the same fees whether I removed the little piece of flesh or for the additional he removed, for my comfort.
Choose a doctor? Whatever for?
I believe that doctors are benevolent in general.
I went back for a few reviews after my surgery and all the while, I was never made to feel like a subsidised patient. Dr Tsang was most professional throughout and I never thought I'd want to get anyone else.
Believe me. Usually, patient attitude counts a lot too. If you degrade or doubt your doctor, then he or she can't do much for you either.
It's a tacit trust in caregiving that makes it all so healing and wonderful.
I'll never argue with my cash by asking for full paying status!
We Must Be Doing Something Really Wrong
We Must Be Doing Something Really Wrong
Singapore must be doing something really, seriously wrong.
We don't have a "decent" opposition. We are almost a one-party state. We are alleged to have a non-transparent system which lacks proper checks and balance. We are even alleged to have a government of "yes-men" who are apparently unable to think beyond what the cabinet wants, much less say anything that is against what the government wants.
We project ourselves as living an oppressed life, in fear, devoid of freedoms of speech, without free newspapers and we will be thrown to political jail in Sentosa if we dare say anything against the government.
Singaporeans bay for opposition like anything on earth.
But there are some anomalies in this place.
Singapore kids at 10 and 14 consistently turn in the world's highest test scores in numeracy and reading achievements.
Singapore has one of the world's most competitive economies.
Singapore has one of the world's least corrupt governments.
Singapore has one of the world's busiest, if not busiest, ports.
Singapore has one of the world's best medical systems.
Almost every Singaporean family owns their place, with more than 85% living in government housing.
Singapore has portable drinking water and is free from major illnesses such as polio or TB.
Singapore babies are vaccinated against major illnesses since birth and periodically as they grow up.
Singapore has one of the world's best airport. In fact, it is one of the airhubs of Asia.
Singapore is home to some political dissidents thrown out of neighbouring countries.
Singapore makes people think twice before they shoot their mouths off and accuse us of things that are untrue: Otherwise, Singapore reserves the right to a robust rebuttal.
Singapore has a decent enough transport system (compared to many places I have visited).
Singapore has opportunities for its young in education, its mature population in work, training and retraining opportunities, and its old in healthcare and palliative care. (While I cannot say the same for cheap, heavily subsidised palliative care, existence itself is a start). Singapore has begun to think "inclusively", to take care of the disabled population. What Singapore needs to do is to take care of its gay and single population more, but then I digress.
Singapore has one of the world's best proliferation in IT and internet access.
Singapore ruling party government manages to share its surpluses with the population to help them with the challenging environment they live in.
We must be doing something really wrong. Somehow.
Singapore must be doing something really, seriously wrong.
We don't have a "decent" opposition. We are almost a one-party state. We are alleged to have a non-transparent system which lacks proper checks and balance. We are even alleged to have a government of "yes-men" who are apparently unable to think beyond what the cabinet wants, much less say anything that is against what the government wants.
We project ourselves as living an oppressed life, in fear, devoid of freedoms of speech, without free newspapers and we will be thrown to political jail in Sentosa if we dare say anything against the government.
Singaporeans bay for opposition like anything on earth.
But there are some anomalies in this place.
Singapore kids at 10 and 14 consistently turn in the world's highest test scores in numeracy and reading achievements.
Singapore has one of the world's most competitive economies.
Singapore has one of the world's least corrupt governments.
Singapore has one of the world's busiest, if not busiest, ports.
Singapore has one of the world's best medical systems.
Almost every Singaporean family owns their place, with more than 85% living in government housing.
Singapore has portable drinking water and is free from major illnesses such as polio or TB.
Singapore babies are vaccinated against major illnesses since birth and periodically as they grow up.
Singapore has one of the world's best airport. In fact, it is one of the airhubs of Asia.
Singapore is home to some political dissidents thrown out of neighbouring countries.
Singapore makes people think twice before they shoot their mouths off and accuse us of things that are untrue: Otherwise, Singapore reserves the right to a robust rebuttal.
Singapore has a decent enough transport system (compared to many places I have visited).
Singapore has opportunities for its young in education, its mature population in work, training and retraining opportunities, and its old in healthcare and palliative care. (While I cannot say the same for cheap, heavily subsidised palliative care, existence itself is a start). Singapore has begun to think "inclusively", to take care of the disabled population. What Singapore needs to do is to take care of its gay and single population more, but then I digress.
Singapore has one of the world's best proliferation in IT and internet access.
Singapore ruling party government manages to share its surpluses with the population to help them with the challenging environment they live in.
We must be doing something really wrong. Somehow.
Singapore as an Artificial State
Singapore as an Artificial State
There are a few questions we must ask ourselves before we decide who we should vote for in an election. Then we must seek the answers we want and see which candidates are able to give us the answers we seek if they are elected. Then we make our choice.
Question 1
Singapore is not blessed with all the natural resources like her neighbouring countries. How do we eke out a living?
Question 2
Can Singapore really afford to have an opposition for the sake of having an opposition? Need Singapore have it?
Question 3
In an election, we are choosing a government that can best further the larger population's larger interests. In choosing a member of parliament who represents the community we live in, we are choosing someone who can better further the larger community's larger interest. What's wrong if I vote the ruling party and benefit in the long run? (Voting is no different from horse betting!)
Question 4
What is the role of opposition in Singapore?
Question 5
Checks and balances exist in the form of independent auditors and nosey pokers. The former are able to find any needle in any haystack while the latter provide food for thought and further investigation. This is proven by NKF. In fact, NKF was brought to justice by the very mechanism that an opposition leader put in contempt. What can the opposition offer?
Question 6
What's wrong with getting my Singapore Progress Package money from the government? Hey, that's a tax rebate. Why does the opposition feel unhappy that the people get tax rebates (although in the form of a handout)? Can opposition offer more money? If not, then what happens to the excess cash? Will there be excess cash?
Question 7
Is a democracy the best way of running a country?
I'm past the age of having idealist thoughts about having a government which has a healthy opposition yah dah yah dah yah dah.
Checks and balances in a country the size of a nose-wax on a piece of A3 paper is really no big deal. One fart of a Ferrari and you risk dropping into the surrounding seas. Checks and balances, however, mean a lot to large countries because there is simply no way to ensure that California is doing things the right way when everyone else is in DC. Or Chiang Rai and Bangkok. If you project Singapore on a piece of A4 paper, a coffee spill near the business district would have possibly drowned out the entire backbone of government. Everyone is that close.
If there had been any doubts at all of the need for checks and balances, independent private sector auditors are more than ready to pounce on any unsuspecting agency and tear it into pieces in no time. If the agencies manage at all to hoodwink the national audit agency, that is.
I am content to have a job, to have disposable income, have a stable place to live in, enjoy first world amenities at upper-end third world prices, live in a secure enough environment where I don't have to take off my shoes to board a plane, have a robust economy with periodic tax rebates (especially before elections).
Whichever government is able to give me that gets my vote.
I am very tempted to see the fate of opposition if the ruling party offers the residents of any constituency a upfront 5% tax rebate for the upcoming term of office if the constituency has a walkover. And a tax rebate worth 10% of the percentage votes in excess of 50% won by the ruling party in any constituency? If the ruling party loses, then the tax rebates is forfeited.
People vote opposition and what happens?
Singaporeans do not understand that they are not delivering the correct message. The opposition could win a good number of seats. So what? They have the potential to cause chaos in the parliament sittings and soon, MNCs will disappear from Singapore. Singapore may lose its competitiveness because of frequent policy U-turns. Or worse, we have an opposition who sit in and waste precious time because of their directionless questioning. Then productivity is affected, people lose their jobs.
What have Singaporeans done to the opposition members? They have ruined their lives by dangling before them a chance that will never materialise. Steve Chia is almost calling it quits. High time too. A guy like him would do much better elsewhere.
Good people who oppose can stay on. Then their community lags behind because they simply don't have the clout and financial backing to catch up. Then why do people begrudge their own choices?
The ruling party can do what it wants. But people must know what to do to even out the playing field.
The true variable in the equation is not whether we have an opposition or not. It is the pride of Singaporeans, which is exponential to the amount of money he has in his pocket.
If you don't believe, just look around. How many people would do irrational things just because they have some money in their pockets? And if people are irrational because of the cash they own, then policies will be set to take advantage of the irrational behaviour of these people to fund the needs of the poorer people.
Basic economics principles here.
Singapore has come of age. At 41, she should be like Madonna. Unfortunately, many people are still behaving like rugrats. Until the rugrats grow up, Madonna will never exude the exuberance of an immaculate material girl. Until the population matures, Singapore will never have what it takes to have a cultured population, much less have a credible opposition (we really can forget about the first world opposition).
There are a few questions we must ask ourselves before we decide who we should vote for in an election. Then we must seek the answers we want and see which candidates are able to give us the answers we seek if they are elected. Then we make our choice.
Question 1
Singapore is not blessed with all the natural resources like her neighbouring countries. How do we eke out a living?
Question 2
Can Singapore really afford to have an opposition for the sake of having an opposition? Need Singapore have it?
Question 3
In an election, we are choosing a government that can best further the larger population's larger interests. In choosing a member of parliament who represents the community we live in, we are choosing someone who can better further the larger community's larger interest. What's wrong if I vote the ruling party and benefit in the long run? (Voting is no different from horse betting!)
Question 4
What is the role of opposition in Singapore?
Question 5
Checks and balances exist in the form of independent auditors and nosey pokers. The former are able to find any needle in any haystack while the latter provide food for thought and further investigation. This is proven by NKF. In fact, NKF was brought to justice by the very mechanism that an opposition leader put in contempt. What can the opposition offer?
Question 6
What's wrong with getting my Singapore Progress Package money from the government? Hey, that's a tax rebate. Why does the opposition feel unhappy that the people get tax rebates (although in the form of a handout)? Can opposition offer more money? If not, then what happens to the excess cash? Will there be excess cash?
Question 7
Is a democracy the best way of running a country?
I'm past the age of having idealist thoughts about having a government which has a healthy opposition yah dah yah dah yah dah.
Checks and balances in a country the size of a nose-wax on a piece of A3 paper is really no big deal. One fart of a Ferrari and you risk dropping into the surrounding seas. Checks and balances, however, mean a lot to large countries because there is simply no way to ensure that California is doing things the right way when everyone else is in DC. Or Chiang Rai and Bangkok. If you project Singapore on a piece of A4 paper, a coffee spill near the business district would have possibly drowned out the entire backbone of government. Everyone is that close.
If there had been any doubts at all of the need for checks and balances, independent private sector auditors are more than ready to pounce on any unsuspecting agency and tear it into pieces in no time. If the agencies manage at all to hoodwink the national audit agency, that is.
I am content to have a job, to have disposable income, have a stable place to live in, enjoy first world amenities at upper-end third world prices, live in a secure enough environment where I don't have to take off my shoes to board a plane, have a robust economy with periodic tax rebates (especially before elections).
Whichever government is able to give me that gets my vote.
I am very tempted to see the fate of opposition if the ruling party offers the residents of any constituency a upfront 5% tax rebate for the upcoming term of office if the constituency has a walkover. And a tax rebate worth 10% of the percentage votes in excess of 50% won by the ruling party in any constituency? If the ruling party loses, then the tax rebates is forfeited.
People vote opposition and what happens?
Singaporeans do not understand that they are not delivering the correct message. The opposition could win a good number of seats. So what? They have the potential to cause chaos in the parliament sittings and soon, MNCs will disappear from Singapore. Singapore may lose its competitiveness because of frequent policy U-turns. Or worse, we have an opposition who sit in and waste precious time because of their directionless questioning. Then productivity is affected, people lose their jobs.
What have Singaporeans done to the opposition members? They have ruined their lives by dangling before them a chance that will never materialise. Steve Chia is almost calling it quits. High time too. A guy like him would do much better elsewhere.
Good people who oppose can stay on. Then their community lags behind because they simply don't have the clout and financial backing to catch up. Then why do people begrudge their own choices?
The ruling party can do what it wants. But people must know what to do to even out the playing field.
The true variable in the equation is not whether we have an opposition or not. It is the pride of Singaporeans, which is exponential to the amount of money he has in his pocket.
If you don't believe, just look around. How many people would do irrational things just because they have some money in their pockets? And if people are irrational because of the cash they own, then policies will be set to take advantage of the irrational behaviour of these people to fund the needs of the poorer people.
Basic economics principles here.
Singapore has come of age. At 41, she should be like Madonna. Unfortunately, many people are still behaving like rugrats. Until the rugrats grow up, Madonna will never exude the exuberance of an immaculate material girl. Until the population matures, Singapore will never have what it takes to have a cultured population, much less have a credible opposition (we really can forget about the first world opposition).
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